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Can You Tell?
Contributed by
Jilli_bean
on
Monday, 5th May 2003 @ 05:05:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
Destruction, Death, Pain
they became bland topics
cuts and scars were getting old and pointless
they proved nothing anymore
During the storm
its calm / you see the eyes
Numbed and cold
brought to its peak , it explodes
baggy clothes could only hide so much
they didnt point out the person
they hid the person
took them away
when the storm stops
its done
for a while
then it rages again
they cycle can only continue on
with motivation
invisible they choose
until they slipped
they storm as well invisible
until it strikes
sometimes the most pain
is caused by the shortest storm
they were gone
not by means of themselves
happy and content they were actually
to bad for that storm though
** I know it was a bit confusing...but think about it....it makes sense..and yes...the person dies...
Copyright ©
Jilli_bean
... [
2003-05-05 05:05:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Can You Tell?
(User Rating: 1 )
by cryingonmyporch on
Tuesday, 6th May 2003 @ 01:00:31 AM AEST
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I understood it and yes it makes sense.
Good work.
Always
Amy |
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Re: Can You Tell?
(User Rating: 1 )
by stargazer on
Sunday, 18th May 2003 @ 07:08:37 PM AEST
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Took a few reads.... a lot actually. Everytime I read it, I picked up on something more... something that wasn't really there.
You told me that there is more to poetry than what is just written.... so here is my reasoning for the poem.
You can only hide so much. Clothes can only hid so much and you can only cut and make so many scars and then... you run out of time. And like you said... the biggest storm does not always leave the most damage. It is short, small storms that leave the most damage and cause the most trouble. It is the small storms that are remembered.
And yes... the cycle does continue on... forever. And in the storm all you can see is the eyes.... the center of the storm.
One of your best Jillian. Makes you wonder and makes you think. Love it...
Amy |
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