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Letting You Go
Contributed by
angelus8663
on
Friday, 30th December 2011 @ 06:14:34 AM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
I’m broken inside and I’m the one to blame,
I took what we had, and touched it to the flame.
There’s nothing I wouldn’t do, for one last chance,
I’d fall on my sword, pierce my heart with a lance.
To say I regret my mistake, would be no exaggeration,
The depths of my sorrow, know no limitation.
If I could take it back, I would in a second,
Of the pain I have caused, I never reckoned.
it’s my own fault, I fell under her deceptive spell,
There’s a place reserved for me, in the seventh circle of hell.
We’re over now, and I know I stuck a dagger through your heart,
You will find someone better, and from my life you will depart.
You have every right to hate me, I would hate me too,
If you want to never see me again, that’s what I’ll do,
But if we never speak again, I just want you to know,
That the biggest regret of my life, is letting you go.
Copyright ©
angelus8663
... [
2011-12-30 06:14:34]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Letting You Go
(User Rating: 1 )
by Daniel_L_Bamberg on
Friday, 30th December 2011 @ 09:33:23 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Well done. Great job to stay on key with a difficult to pull off 11 syllable structure. I am typically not a fan of the Clerihew (AABB) rhyme structure, just I am no fan of its creator Edmund Bentley but in cases such as yours it is a worthy read.
Good job!
DLB |
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Re: Letting You Go
(User Rating: 1 )
by aliopterix on
Friday, 30th December 2011 @ 04:23:45 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| It's refreshing to hear a tale of deception from the part of the protagonist and not the victim. Great write Dave. |
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