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As Tears Fall
Contributed by
northernlights
on
Wednesday, 28th December 2011 @ 10:35:37 AM in AEST
Topic:
Grief
|
A single white rose my words to you,
To convey all that cannot be said.
A single white rose carrying all of my love,
A voiceless gesture that’s true.
For I cannot take your pain away
Nor tread your path of grief.
I cannot halt the tide of tears
Nor ever claim that I know.
But as each petal falls from purity
I will not fade nor fail.
And when It is time for your voice,
Then I will be here.
Copyright ©
northernlights
... [
2011-12-28 10:35:37]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: As Tears Fall
(User Rating: 1 )
by aliopterix on
Wednesday, 28th December 2011 @ 11:41:25 AM AEST
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| So sad but beautifully written and presented - - Aliopterix |
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Re: As Tears Fall
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 28th December 2011 @ 05:07:11 PM AEST
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I love poems like this and here lies no exception.
You are obviusly devoted to whoever this was written for.
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Re: As Tears Fall
(User Rating: 1 )
by Daniel_L_Bamberg on
Thursday, 29th December 2011 @ 01:27:02 AM AEST
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This is a perfect example of saying so much with so little and erupting passion with less on a simple tone, simple measure, and simple subject.
I am reminded of a legend about Ernest Hemingway. He and a few buddies were having some drinks at a bar when a challenge was set. After explaining to his pals that he could compose a powerful and emotional story using only 6 words, his buddies bet against it. Great author or not, six words for a whole story is impossible, or so it seemed.
His buddies placed their money down. Hemingway stepped away, took a pen and napkin from the bartender jotted something down and handed the napkin to his buddies, amused by his serious demeanor. Once they looked down at the napkin and read the six words, their jest turned to sincere contemplation and even heartbreak.
The napkin read "For Sale: Baby shoes, never worn."
Sometimes the way one constructs simplicity is a key to being a solid writer, as you have shown so marvelously here.
Other times one can plant too many flowery words in a poem's garden that they appear more like weeds than roses. This is certainly not in your case.
You were too the point, passionate, poetic, and captured me from opening to end. More importantly your work here is not forgettable and in today's poetry world that alone speaks volumes.
BRAVO!
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