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Drowning in Pain
Contributed by
deusdeira
on
Sunday, 25th December 2011 @ 01:50:26 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
I try to run ...but here i fall,
laying in this... empty hall,
i yell for help... but no one hears,
the floor is drowning... in my tears,
the floor so slick... from fallen hope,
attempt to swim... this endless moat,
but boots of lead ... they drag me down,
I thrash and fight ... with thoughts profound,
And when my boots... hit rock bottom,
I find a place... so long forgotten,
that even hope... and precious dreams,
cannot find me... if I scream,
so here I drift... forever more,
and never stand... upon love's shore.
Copyright ©
deusdeira
... [
2011-12-25 13:50:26]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Drowning in Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by richard2 on
Sunday, 25th December 2011 @ 02:16:51 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| Very powerful. It moves through the emotions very well. I like your rhyming also, I like that most are not forced. |
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Re: Drowning in Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by BritVent on
Monday, 26th December 2011 @ 04:55:21 PM AEST
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| This is very beautiful, well written. Great emotion. |
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Re: Drowning in Pain
(User Rating: 1 )
by xxhopelesslovexx on
Monday, 26th December 2011 @ 05:46:30 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| very nice your poem sounds like one of mine i havent posted yet |
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