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Squashing You
Contributed by
Cancer
on
Friday, 2nd May 2003 @ 05:35:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
trapped in the corner
backed you against the wall
from where i am, i feel so ***** big
and you just look so small
i smile at my impending victory
and laugh at your impending doom
i savor the moment, i gloat a bit
but know, your death is coming soon
i ask if you have any last words
but you're silent as you tremble with fear
my eyes glaze over, the smile vanishes
and you know your time is near
i aim my gun, brace myself
and set three bullets free
i know that may seem like a bit much
but, you were the biggest spider i'd ever seen
Copyright ©
Cancer
... [
2003-05-02 05:35:00] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Squashing You
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Friday, 2nd May 2003 @ 07:06:58 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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This is a very strange poem. I like it but it is really odd. You build up all this tension and then we discover that this fearsome creature that has tormented you is......... a spider.
I love the way you set the scene. Wth it baced into a corner and how you feel so bigcompared to your foe.
Really good and really unique.
sleepless_siren |
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Re: Squashing You
(User Rating: 1 ) by Ilhar on
Friday, 2nd May 2003 @ 08:09:41 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Unusual write but very good I never expected your foe to be a spider
Shari |
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Re: Squashing You
(User Rating: 1 ) by shelby on
Friday, 2nd May 2003 @ 10:23:52 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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oh my gosh you had me going!! I was almost scared!! LOL. A spider, this is a great write with an awesome twist on the end. Hey please come too the desert and help me with all of my creepy crawlers, they are everywhere. (SMILE)
Michelle |
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