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TWICE UPON A NOONTIME DEARY
Contributed by
robert_edgar_burns
on
Sunday, 20th November 2011 @ 06:02:24 PM in AEST
Topic:
HumorPoetry
|
(A parody Of Poe’s “The Raven”)
Twice upon a noon time Deary.
I wore sunglasses to see more clearly.
A raisin escaped from my vineyard shores.
“Never to return” quoth the raisin AlGore!
As I awaken within my palace,
I spill the beer foaming in my chalice.
I hear a bang, bang, at my door.
Could it be the raisin who is named AlGore?
Said I to the stranger who was at my door,
“It’s later than three, it’s nearly four!”
With a great deal of force I open the screen.
It was a seedless grape, not red, mostly green.
After drinking a little of it’s plentious juice,
I yell quite loudly, “Let’s have a truce!”
Now I was shaking but also craving,
I’d give anything to find that plump juicy raisin.
Now back into my bedroom churning,
My plump stomach is with acid burning.
I know there’s Pepto Bismol at the store,
But in the dark waits that raisin, called AlGore.
Way back in time in the days of yore,
We stood our ground with raisins galore.
I dreamed in a vision that they changed their ilk.
They must be drowned now, and killed in milk.
When I awakened my purpose was clear.
I’d have to keep bran and milk very near.
Coming in through the mail chute at my front door,
The raisin starts to dance across my living room floor.
It landed right in my cereal bowl
Looking just like a hairy old mole,
But when It tried to just jump right out,
I sprinkled sugar in the bowl all about.
It died from glucose way too high.
But the taste was great, it made me sigh.
If I could get more like this in a box,
Maybe just two scoops, that would be tops.
Twice upon a this time Deary.
I was now able to see more clearly.
A raisin was eaten and I would like some more
“But I never shall return” quoth the raisin AlGore!
In Explanation:
This is a parody in rhyme of Edgar Allen Poe's
"The Raven," which itself was a nonsensical but catchy
rhyming patterned poem. Instead of a Raven bird as the
main character ("Quoth The Raven, Nevermore!") this is
a Kelloggs' two scoops type live raisin named Algore!
You know, like you eat in a bowl of cereal with milk!
He was dreaded by people just like the real Al Gore was
by Republicans, and just like the real guy said he won't
return to the political arena, just like the raisin's last words!
Sorry if I wasn't more informative in the body of the poem. I
thought to me at least, everything would be obvious. But if
you've never read THE RAVEN, I can see having confusion!
I hope this helps!
Copyright ©
robert_edgar_burns
... [
2011-11-20 18:02:24]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: TWICE UPON A NOONTIME DEARY
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 20th November 2011 @ 10:46:06 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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Fantastic.
#1 |
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