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SHE JUST WON'T DIE

Contributed by robert_edgar_burns on Wednesday, 2nd November 2011 @ 10:43:42 AM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry

Out of my zone on my way home
It was an early morn in the fall.
But a domestic was now in progress,
And I was ordered to take this call!
I arrived at a two bedroom house
Just a block from where I lived.
A thought was running through my mind,
“What resistance will they give?”
As I approached the front door,
From inside I heard a scream.
I knocked and loudly announced myself.
The door was locked as well as the screen.
“Help he’s trying to kill me”
Yelled the same voice as before.
I didn’t have to think twice,
So I broke down that front door.
I observed a knife raised in the air
As I raised my gun up high.
But when I did a double take
I could hardly believe my eyes!
He was yelling “I am John Cerutti,
And this bee-atch she just won’t die!”
“We both have passed one hundred years,
“Don’t you think it’s well past time?”
I grabbed his arm and took his knife,
And pushed him onto a couch!
His brittle leg shot up toward me
Causing me to yell out “Ouch!”
A sucker kick right into my groin
Hitting such a tender spot.
I almost punched him in the face
But I just cussed at that old snot!
I turned and saw another knife
Coming at me from behind.
Mrs. Cerutti was at me yelling.
“Stop!, can’t you see that he is blind?”
I disarmed the century old lady,
And I didn’t know what to do.
I imagined tomorrow’s headlines,
And the laughter that might ensue!
The problem was solved soon,
I called the elderly crime unit that day.
They responded for the old folks own good,
And in custody drove them away.
I didn’t take too much ribbing,
From fellow officers, friends and such.
It died down in a month or two,
When my balls didn’t hurt so much!

Copyright Â© robert_edgar_burns ... [ 2011-11-02 10:43:42]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: SHE JUST WON'T DIE (User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on Wednesday, 2nd November 2011 @ 05:35:15 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Well I guess since it's been a while that it's safe to laugh.
It just cracks me up.
Smiles,
#1

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