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Lost my mind
Contributed by
unorthodox
on
Saturday, 2nd July 2011 @ 12:34:13 AM in AEST
Topic:
Grief
|
I tried and I tried,
but you couldn’t be reached,
from my heart, from my soul,
did I not speak?
When I told you that I loved you,
and expressed my concerns;
of repugnance which surrounds you,
in the final day's; before,
I lost my mind
I tried to warn you
of these faces in the crowd,
who will use you and abuse you;
who only wish bring you down,
to take advantage of your youth
and expose you like a secret,
in the final days; before,
I lost my mind
It seemed that I had gotten through,
when you hugged me and smiled,
applauded my efforts
to openly connect, I thought that you
had heard me loud and clear,
when I sent the message
admitting my fears,
but I see it was for naught,
as you slumber still,
in the many years ;after,
I lost my mind
Copyright ©
unorthodox
... [
2011-07-02 00:34:13]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Lost my mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by ammar on
Saturday, 2nd July 2011 @ 06:49:09 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| A good write, with meaningful structuring and a powerful refrain. |
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Re: Lost my mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by poeticjestix on
Saturday, 2nd July 2011 @ 01:43:59 PM AEST
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We all fall into the trap of wanting to live someone elses life for them. This expresses the emotion of the concerned- who are generally jealous in some form or other but knows the door is locked. Why is it locked to me?
That is the greatest mystery in the world |
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Re: Lost my mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by unknown_utopia on
Monday, 4th July 2011 @ 07:35:39 PM AEST
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It's hard watching someone you care about
fall down
when you told them how not to. |
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Re: Lost my mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by FlintHunter on
Friday, 2nd September 2011 @ 11:17:39 AM AEST
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Again, a triumph. This poem has a Secret -- I only got a little of that secret in a couple readings. I hope to get more of the secret when I read it again. And -- as far as losing one's mind -- you are not the only one, my friend -- I live There. It's okay -- Here -- and sometimes more honest than other more 'respectable' Places...
--Flint |
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Re: Lost my mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by desire on
Saturday, 11th August 2012 @ 01:09:42 AM AEST
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a Message)
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What a wonderful piece you have here.
Every poem seems to want to give us a client
To open our eyes about something going
On around us, that we may be oblivious to
Like a conspiracy we need to ne aware of
Very intriguing
I'm addicted |
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