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Too deep.
Contributed by
CommasCanSeperate
on
Wednesday, 6th April 2011 @ 11:02:21 AM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
If I could only store this pain in a jar
If I could somehow put it on paper
If I could seal it inside a box
And keep it to show you later.
If I could make you feel it for a moment
Get a mental X-ray done
Then perhaps, just maybe
I could get help from someone.
This pain inside is killing me
I think more than yours is killing you
It’s there when I’m trying to sleep
It’s there in the morning too.
I’ve taken paracetamol
To try and make it subside
it doesn’t help at all though
The pains too deep inside.
I’m sorry I am grumpy
Grumpy everyday
But maybe you would be too
If you could feel my pain.
Copyright ©
CommasCanSeperate
... [
2011-04-06 11:02:21]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Too deep.
(User Rating: 1 )
by Deidra_Carmichael on
Wednesday, 6th April 2011 @ 02:23:58 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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I like the simplicity and focus in your poem. You don't deviate from what you're trying to prove (your point). The theme of it reminds me of a breakup between two lovers who aren't compatible yet truly love each other. Take care and God bless,
Deidra |
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Re: Too deep.
(User Rating: 1 )
by deusdeira on
Thursday, 7th April 2011 @ 12:13:17 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| pain is something we all have to live with unfortunately. Some more than others. I wish you the best, and hope that you find a cure for this pain. |
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