|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
I hope for the day I wont cry anymore
Contributed by
AkidaUmichi
on
Sunday, 6th February 2011 @ 04:05:19 PM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
There is a lot I learned not to show or ask
Because every time I did
It never turned out right
The biggest thing I learned not to do is to cry
Because I tend to cry to often
So now I try to turn that sadness into anger
Only when it gets to be too much do I cry
I hate myself for it
My sadness turns to anger and that anger is bottled up
If it’s not released
I tend to hurt myself and others around me
If I cry
I’ll end up crying myself to sleep
And crying yourself to sleep is one of the worst ways to go to sleep
So now
I hope for the day I just don’t cry anymore
Copyright ©
AkidaUmichi
... [
2011-02-06 16:05:19]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: I hope for the day I wont cry anymore
(User Rating: 1 )
by Aspirant on
Sunday, 6th February 2011 @ 09:20:54 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Good work. My advice would be to try and get outside the mindset of forming sentences. You might get more of a feel for writing this kind of thing if you try to bring out your ideas in a more flexible format. Fewer unnecessary, undescriptive, grammatical words like "to," "it," "and", etc. More vocab. You'll end up with unique words presented in creative ways, and hopefully your own ideas will come through the poem effectively as a result. |
|
|
Re: I hope for the day I wont cry anymore
(User Rating: 1 )
by RyanS on
Tuesday, 8th February 2011 @ 06:12:51 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| This is a good start, lots of emotion and the comment above me has given GREAT advice! |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
