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Withered
Contributed by
hauntedscorp
on
Sunday, 3rd October 2010 @ 12:12:36 PM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
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Actively seeking an asylum for the mundane
Run my fingers along the deadened nerves of your brain
It’s crowded in there, full of perversions and fears
Only the light escapes while the darkness adheres
Your weakness is a button that gets pushed often
A little curveball makes your willpower soften
I keep crossing wires hoping to see a spark of life
Ambushed by your little white lies that cut like a knife
I see a resignation in you that can’t be faked
A symphony of loss, an ode to the heart that ached
Full of lusts and sins that need to be defeated
Inner voice screams but the sound has been depleted
Your spirit is lonely, wandering through the night
Punching at air you will ensure you lose this fight
Lifeless eyes see something in the mirror that they despise
Savage addictions are claiming rights to your demise
In short order you start to fold, just like a cheap suit
The devil got bored, and he needed a new recruit
Reach out from the fog, clear the cobwebs from your eyes
That oasis you seek is satan in disguise
Stand up for yourself, yours is a life worth saving
Do not fall victim to the lure of a craving
Shout out at the top of your lungs until you are heard
Drop down to your knees and demand that your sins be purged
Your thoughts can not be trusted so you must tune them out
As the hours turn into days your mind will cast some doubt
The junkies are circling, they want to fix you up
Parched with thirst, but don’t drink from the forbidden cup
Help me to knock down those walls that you have created
This monster feeds on you but it can be abated
Why didn’t you listen to all that I have said?
I cried for you this morning when I found you dead.
Copyright ©
hauntedscorp
... [
2010-10-03 12:12:36]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Withered
(User Rating: 1 )
by DrcGaimer on
Sunday, 3rd October 2010 @ 01:30:16 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Wow, all I can say is "deep". |
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Re: Withered
(User Rating: 1 )
by northernlights on
Sunday, 3rd October 2010 @ 02:49:21 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Only the light escapes while the darkness adheres.........hope fades with every desperate attempt to save life, leaving overwhelming sadness.You have communicated effectively the horror of addiction and the consequences with a unique and personal depth of sensitivity. |
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Re: Withered
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 3rd October 2010 @ 08:01:01 PM AEST
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Deep. deep. deep. and very powerful.
Awesome writing.
huggs, blessings,
emy |
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Re: Withered
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 3rd October 2010 @ 11:29:06 PM AEST
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| ***** fire *****, Scorpendous!!!!!! |
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Re: Withered
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Monday, 4th October 2010 @ 11:49:15 AM AEST
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Scorp,
This poem is rich in imagery.Inbeginning thje poem seems to focus upon hopelessnes. The power of evil..tt appears t hat inner streng th prevailis. ther apperrs there is an awareness that the inner deouts are of your own makinig
Well done Scorp,, and tha ns for your ffeedback. I;ve enjoyed hearing from you again.
Will |
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Re: Withered
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 4th October 2010 @ 03:06:18 PM AEST
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Clarification:
My previous comment were words that are not allowed....quite the expletives I should say. As soon as I got to that second, line, it was like holy moly!!! This is definitely a Scorperiffic poem if I ever saw one. Oh wait, I've seen 130 of them!!!
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Re: Withered
(User Rating: 1 )
by TsunamiWaverider on
Wednesday, 6th October 2010 @ 04:49:10 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Actually, i'm quite impressed. Some really good lines in there. I hope that it wasn't based on a true story from your life as finding someone you care for or love dead must be totally gut-wrenching.
Nice and emotive and well written.
7/10 which equates to 3.5 out of 5.
Drats, i can't give 3.5 in the votes so i will have to round up...or down.....hmm? |
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Re: Withered
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Saturday, 10th May 2014 @ 12:58:22 PM AEST
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a Message)
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sadly and unfortunately when in the throws of
{any} addiction, one cannot see the forest for the
trees; if this was someone you knew, i'm so
sorry for your loss! this poem is penned so truly
beautifully and should be placed in all
community centers everywhere...
hugs n' love nessa |
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