Struggle, Conflict and Too much strife...
Contributed by
neverlosehope
on
Saturday, 11th September 2010 @ 09:38:20 AM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
This monster that's so strong,
Makes me feel like there's somewhere i belong,
With days so dark, no hope, and no reason to go on,
Not eating will vanish the pain, as soon i could be gone,
Cant change whats happened, can't fix whats wrong,
If i cant make it right,
I will slowly disappear,
I have no reason to fight,
I cant allow myself to eat certain things,
When really i know the pain it brings,
But i look at myself in the mirror and see my own reflection,
I have these awful thoughts; just total rejection,
I wish i could just close the door to this bloody anorexic voice,
But really i cannot turn away,
I need its protection,
I need it to stay,
When you are feeling sad and low,
And not sure of where you've got to go,
When you just wish you were free,
But of course you need positivity,
Something that i lack deep inside,
I give up, I tried,
Hope is gone,
No longer can i be strong,
Hiding away in my room,
Hoping it will all be over soon,
Memories won't fade,
They have permanently stayed,
Insecure from all the pain,
It remains the same along with the shame,
For years my life has been a rollercoaster, always up and down,
Never does the smile stay, always revealing the frown,
People always say I will get better if i talk,
When all i really want to do is go on a never-ending walk,
My life just seems so dim,
How the hell did this monster get in?
In reality food is needed to survive,
But its not hard to convince yourself, that food is the enemy that keeps you alive,
So with my smile wiped off my face,
I sign my life over to be alone in this empty place,
But life is never good for me,
This is just what i want you all to see,
No one seems to understand,
That keeping me here is just making me worse,
If i were dead and gone from this world,
Then i would no longer have the curse,
I will miss you all, but just cant handle it anymore,
My life is just not what it was before,
Sorry to leave you all behind,
But at least up high, happiness i can find,
So please do not be mad at me when i choose to take my life,
Struggle, Conflict, Just way too much strife...
Copyright ©
neverlosehope
... [
2010-09-11 09:38:20]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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