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I am not ok
Contributed by
rhei76
on
Thursday, 21st January 2010 @ 05:37:45 AM in AEST
Topic:
self-harmpoetry
|
I am not okay
I cut myself
to feel the pain
of thy inner cell
to let my brain know
i am still real
but it runs and callogulates
so i wonder if this is life
or just a feeling i truelly hate
like a cloud that will never eleviate
i'm fog, never truelly high
So i yell outside
is this heaven or hell
like i really care
so i cry
just relieve me of this air
this inner cell
just so i can find a center above thyself
Copyright ©
rhei76
... [
2010-01-21 05:37:45]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: I am not ok
(User Rating: 1 )
by n2dep2care on
Thursday, 21st January 2010 @ 09:50:16 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This is a very powerful poem. I love the raw emotion and the place it takes me. I have added a few suggestions- take or leave them. But your poem is very, very good!
I cut myself
to feel the pain
of (my)thy inner cell
to let my brain know
I am real
As it runs and coagulates
I wonder if this is life
or just a feeling I truly hate.
Like a cloud that will never elevate
I am fog, never truly high
I yell (inside) outside
is this heaven or hell
It’s not like I really care
so I cry
just relieve me of this air
this inner cell
so I can find a center above (myself) thyself
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Re: I am not ok
(User Rating: 1 )
by jenniferstein2006 on
Thursday, 21st January 2010 @ 10:03:37 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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| wow really good |
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