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Self Assessment
Contributed by
rosenrot
on
Thursday, 29th October 2009 @ 01:59:34 AM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
Self Assessment
Alone in the streets,
Not a soul by my side.
I begged them in vain,
I don’t know why I tried.
Does anyone care?
Will anyone bother?
Will you help the boy out casted by his mother and father?
My intelligence faded away,
My compassion: down the drain.
No one cares about me,
They just fill my life with pain.
I’ll hide it with anger,
Conceal it with glee.
Can I ever become what she needs me to be?
They say I’m worthless and they declare I’m no good,
“He’s just a bad little child from a bad neighborhood.”
I’m gonna’ grow up big, and then I’ll prove them wrong.
I refuse to live like this my whole life long.
I keep hope through the yelling, fighting, and crying,
I won’t stop, won’t give up, and damn sure won’t ever quit trying.
Years passed; I grew bad, and my fists grew tough,
My father grew sad; he rejected my love,
My mother grew mad; she had about enough,
And she kicked me out of her house just for calling her bluff.
I soaked in remorse, and accepted defeat,
My lust for vendetta left me alone in the street.
So I sat in the cold as I woefully cried,
But no one felt pity; there wasn’t a soul by my side.
I was wrong when I sinned, when I cursed, and when I lied,
But my plea for a second chance has been denied.
Now nobody cares, and no one will bother,
I can’t turn to my mother; can’t run to my father.
No wonder my life didn’t turn out quite right,
Only one person cares if I slept safe each night,
I called his name to the stars, whilst lost in my thoughts,
The echoes were fierce; vindictive gun shots.
I heard his voice reply and my eyes opened wide.
The man who had called back slowly walked to my side.
I knew his face well,
And I softened like butter.
We hugged in the street while he sobbed and I stuttered.
I stepped back looked in his eyes and muttered,
“What happened to family? Why’d they forsake me big brother?”
He spoke with anger and my heart began to race,
“Is it too much to ask for you to have a bit of grace?
You were wrong to mistreat us,
You never should have lied.
All you did was misread us,
We still don’t know why we tried.
You’re so riddled with greed,
You have a hunger for wealth.
Your arrogance made an ass of you,
Go stock your ego on the shelf.
Open your eyes little brother,
You’ve forsaken yourself.”
It took the words of my kin to give me power to see.
I looked at him and mumbled,
“So it’s always been me…?”
Now I’m sitting contently, alone in the street,
A cigarette in my ear, and the word of God by my feet.
They could never tie me down; this boy was born to roam,
But when I look back it wasn’t worth losing a home.
I picked up my spoon and scraped the soup from my bowl,
No one to share with, not a single soul.
Now I see why no one cared, I understand why they didn’t bother,
Who would help a child who disgraced his own father?
Now I accept all the wrong I’ve had to hide,
I forgive myself for when I cheated, cursed, screamed, and lied,
I told my mom I’m sorry for every time she sobbed and cried,
I’m just so scared of being alone in the streets when I die,
Don’t show how you feel, keep the pain locked inside.
Copyright ©
rosenrot
... [
2009-10-29 01:59:34]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Self Assessment
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Thursday, 29th October 2009 @ 02:39:00 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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This is heart wrenching sad but you did a great job of writing it.
You grab the readers attention and don't let go till the last words.
Very touching write.
Hang tuff and remember joy cometh in the morning.
Huggs, blessings,
emy
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