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A Routine
Contributed by
MaryAnson
on
Tuesday, 6th October 2009 @ 12:27:19 PM in AEST
Topic:
anguished
|
It’s never a surprise,
No, I always see it coming
Like a demon on the rise
While I’m steadily succumbing
It wanders back and forth
This burden which impedes
Yet while it’s squandering my worth
I’m afraid it won’t recede
And I want to scrub my eyes
With corrosives strong and sharp
Clouding those which scrutinise,
Those which devastate and warp
The agony would scream
Stabbing, burning, wailing pains
But short suffering would gleam
Next to that which slowly wanes
It is easy to find change
In that which causes one much grief
But is that which is strange
On the outside, or beneath?
Copyright ©
MaryAnson
... [
2009-10-06 12:27:19]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A Routine
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 6th October 2009 @ 12:49:20 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Well this is an impressive follow up to the masterpiece you posted yesterday. A lot of rhyming poems get bogged down in cliches or simplicity, but this was creative and distinct; especially this bit:
'And I want to scrub my eyes
With corrosives strong and sharp
Clouding those which scrutinise,
Those which devastate and warp'
Great stuff once again, keep on writing!
Best wishes,
Phil
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Re: A Routine
(User Rating: 1 )
by spud on
Wednesday, 7th October 2009 @ 03:36:44 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Hi,
We don't always see what life is going to throw
at us - but when it kicks us in the teeth, well then,
it gives us something to write about ....... and you
have captured it perfectly in this rhythmic verse
of sharp precision.
Well done!
Tommy
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Re: A Routine
(User Rating: 1 )
by Daylynn_Van_Wyk on
Wednesday, 7th October 2009 @ 03:50:12 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Damn, i digg the flow, this iz one beautiful poem, i can't wait for your the next one:) |
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