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the charging - senseless?

Contributed by thedarkestsheep on Wednesday, 30th September 2009 @ 04:20:10 AM in AEST
Topic: anguished

I’m getting quicker forgetting and leaving back those who just take what they need
And then I’d never hear a word of them again
Squeezed out, exhausted, left behind in the huge rubbish bin called my world
And hoping and waiting for someone who’d open it to have a look if there’s something left to be dissaved
And I’m getting faster trying to open it myself again and put my head and look around me
Searching for anything, anybody that’s supposed to be waiting out there
All passing by – all trying to find something full to perforate it
And to put their mouthpieces on it’s surfaces and refill themselfes
Just letting it run out of the more or less filled bodies till the last drop
Directly into the the mouth, and directly into the heart
Leaving back slack thin empty dull bodies

Now what am I supposed to do?
Again and again the same?
Refill myself by perishable energy?
Tell myself that the warmth is real?
Do the same as everybody does?
Recharge myself by fleeting energy that I suck out of everybody?

Now am I getting quicker backfilling myself or being sucked dry completely again?
The one thing must go along with the other
But should I just stop padding myself so they’d all leave me alone?
And wait for being filled up by the one that’s supposed to be inside of me?
- indestructilbe energy –
- or should I call it love??

Copyright Â© thedarkestsheep ... [ 2009-09-30 04:20:10]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: the charging - senseless? (User Rating: 1 )
by Antzus on Thursday, 1st October 2009 @ 07:20:37 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

So many questions!

This title is appropriate - the body of the text just feels relentless. The themes, the feelings, abstract as they are they feel familiar to me - as though I can relate to you. Reminds me of "quiet desperation", or something from Dostoevsky

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