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creature comforts
Contributed by
elle
on
Friday, 11th September 2009 @ 08:33:06 PM in AEST
Topic:
ambiguous
|
The corners of my box were prodding.
The fan blades, keeping time.
A pendulum of thought
was slowly weighing on my mind.
A causual accomplice, expanding
the still life of my room
& creature comforts waiting
to lift my shifting gloom.
If gravity is stasis
& paint chips characterize
a wise & thoughtful outcome
will tame any Lord of Flies.
Copyright ©
elle
... [
2009-09-11 20:33:06]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: creature comforts
(User Rating: 1 )
by ming on
Friday, 11th September 2009 @ 11:04:01 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Very deep. Keep them coming...:) |
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Re: creature comforts
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 12th September 2009 @ 04:21:11 AM AEST
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Do my dreaming and my scheming
Lie awake and pray
Do my crying and my sighing
Laugh at yesterday
Now its dark and I'm alone
But I wont be afraid
In my room, in my room
In my room, in my room
In my room, in my room
Oh, and I love the rhyme scheme. |
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Re: creature comforts
(User Rating: 1 )
by woodymiles on
Monday, 14th September 2009 @ 09:51:21 AM AEST
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I like this. Is it casual or causual? I like the latter.
As there is no punctuation, the last stanza can read quite differently, depending on how the reader self punctuates, I put a comma in my mind after characterise. great stuff.
Regards.
Woody |
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