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Nights into Days
Contributed by
ColoradoChick
on
Thursday, 16th July 2009 @ 05:34:10 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
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Stadium air, cool and dry
The competition is ready
Starting line
Pacing between stretches
Nervousness
The starter slowly raises his gun
Hold your breath
With a flash of smoke and fire
The race begins
"You'll never make it, just pipe dreams," they say
"To the Indoor State Championships."
But today
Stride is quick and legs are light
Recounting prayers in the church chapel
Late last night
The track melts below, the finish draws near
Lungs burning to ash, face drenched in tears
The finish brings with it memories
Failures of the past
But second place is good enough today
To qualify for States
Good things come at last
To those who wait.
Copyright ©
ColoradoChick
... [
2009-07-16 17:34:10] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Nights into Days
(User Rating: 1 ) by Jenni_K on
Thursday, 16th July 2009 @ 05:59:49 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Your 'run-on' lines created a great pace for this poem. Well done.
Congratulations on your qualification...and welcome to YPDC...
Jenni |
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Re: Nights into Days
(User Rating: 1 ) by ColoradoChick on
Thursday, 16th July 2009 @ 06:07:27 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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thanks! i felt like writing it down was the perfect way to describe the feeling of finally making it :) |
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Re: Nights into Days
(User Rating: 1 ) by Daylynn_Van_Wyk on
Friday, 17th July 2009 @ 01:44:11 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I felt it, made me feel as if i was actually there, watching as you tore past expectations, and reached your goal! Cool poem i dig it:) keep it up! |
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Re: Nights into Days
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Saturday, 18th July 2009 @ 09:03:15 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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That's what I like to see (or in this case, read); Defiance and BELIEF! Everybody likes to think they are a professional critic or some budding mystic with an insight into the future. Shows what they know! Beautiful words for a beautiful triumph.
-phil |
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