|
Menu
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
Don't tell mother...
Contributed by
foxwithwings13
on
Saturday, 27th June 2009 @ 01:51:12 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Don't tell mother
That her daughters heart belongs to the one
with makeup and ribbons in her hair
As fingers are laced together between them
And a bittersweet melody is played
With love and rejection
But mother could not hide her little girl
From the unforgivable sin
And she was destined to fall for the girl
Behind warm brown eyes
With makeup and ribbons in her hair
Copyright ©
foxwithwings13
... [
2009-06-27 13:51:12] (Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment. That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Don't tell mother...
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Saturday, 27th June 2009 @ 04:52:13 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
an excellent first piece with great use of enjambment. keep writing, you've got potential.
-Phil |
|
|
Re: Don't tell mother...
(User Rating: 1 ) by Kay-Kay on
Saturday, 27th June 2009 @ 08:50:17 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
great write! good topic different from alotta other ppl which i like lol look forward to reading more |
|
|
Re: Don't tell mother...
(User Rating: 1 ) by Mars on
Sunday, 28th June 2009 @ 05:59:20 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Not bad, I think you'll make a fine poet. |
|
|
|