|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
looking back, wishing forward
Contributed by
polaris773
on
Monday, 13th April 2009 @ 11:47:34 PM in AEST
Topic:
MiscPoems
|
Im not sure why
She keeps looking at me
But Im sure she knows
I’ve been looking back
I’ve been looking back for a while
Maybe she will be the one
To move me forward
So I don’t have to look backwards
The look on her face says
She’s thirsty and her eyes say lonely
I send her a drink and smile
The smile she sends, thanks me
If I were a better man
I would talk to her and get her name
Looking back I should have
I want to see her smile every morning
Copyright ©
polaris773
... [
2009-04-13 23:47:34]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: looking back, wishing forward
(User Rating: 1 )
by 3660Days on
Tuesday, 14th April 2009 @ 01:21:26 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| To the point, good imagery, not too choppy, not too amateurish. I really liked the ending. I give you 4/5 for it's own merit, 5/5 by ypdc standards. Well done. |
|
|
Re: looking back, wishing forward
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 14th April 2009 @ 11:05:10 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
good writing, the imagery was powerful and the climax was superb.
-Phil |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
