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Lost In This Maze..

Contributed by fireheart on Wednesday, 4th March 2009 @ 07:28:18 PM in AEST
Topic: SadPoetry

The light in the end of the tunnel.
Has faded away..
Am now surround by complete darkness.
Lost in this maze.
Thinking why my star of my night disappear?
The only thing I had to find myself out.
I walk and walk and I don't know where am heading too?
Lost in the wrong path I took.
Lost in the maze forever.
The wind blows and I hear your name.
I try to forget all about you.
Try to live my life.
But I can't
Am now and forever.
Surround by darkness.
Have no stars to guide me though the night..
Tangled forever in this web..
Trying to find a way out ..
Is there a way out???

Copyright © fireheart ... [ 2009-03-04 19:28:18]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Lost In This Maze.. (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 4th March 2009 @ 08:40:54 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Your ending was painfully familiar-- to anyone who's ever had any mending to do.
I like the way you began this and pulled us into your darkness. For me, to truly
incite your readers is a testament to the excellence of a poem.

(I would only suggest that you watch your tense--ie: disappear should be disappeared
and surround should be surrounded)

a wonderful read !

~ Breezy

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