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Just Like That Part 2
Contributed by
allforyou
on
Wednesday, 4th February 2009 @ 09:44:12 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
And just like that,
I'm caught in a rush;
you say its love, you're such a lush.
And just like that,
I stumbled upon,
a place I never should have gone.
And just like that,
it all disappeared;
replaced with everything I feared.
And just like that,
it seemed so grave;
a world of love and all its slaves.
And just like that,
I felt so cold;
took in the new; threw out the old.
And just like that,
I closed my eyes;
ate all the words that burned inside.
And just like that,
I breathed a little deeper;
accepted the fact that the steps just get steeper.
Copyright ©
allforyou
... [
2009-02-04 21:44:12] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Just Like That Part 2
(User Rating: 1 ) by Invierno on
Saturday, 15th September 2018 @ 09:57:57 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
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This is truly a wonderful poem. It flowed like buttah until the last stanza. I find it helps to read a poem out loud to myself before posting. The verbalization will reveal hiccups the mind doesn/'/t see in a mental read. If you want to get serious on the editing, print it out and read it from a page. Al kinds of things manifest that usually will increase the appeal of the piece.
I hope you aren/'/t an ego creature. I always welcome advice. Doesn/'/t mean I have to take it, but it/'/s still good to get.
This poem is really, really neat. I/'/m forwarding it to another poet on this site; softerware. She/'/s a buddy, a very, very good poet, and I know this is right up her alley.
Mike |
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Re: Just Like That Part 2
(User Rating: 1 ) by softerware on
Sunday, 16th September 2018 @ 05:28:31 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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What a pleasure to read this!
Do you have a musical background?
You can set the time on your rhythm scheme!!
Not to mention, I liked the content also!
softerware |
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