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Faded Out
Contributed by
lonely_boy
on
Monday, 12th January 2009 @ 10:56:11 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
there once was a time
when everything was fine
i was happy
when i called you mine
the days stood still
as i held you near
my heart skipped beats
whenever you spoke
to just feel you again
to hear you speak my name
to see your eyes sparkle
when i say something sweet
to be close to you
to keep you safe from harm
to be the one
that you wake up to
i'd give it all
my heart and soul
but you've moved on
left me in the background
and where am i
when the background has faded out
Copyright ©
lonely_boy
... [
2009-01-12 22:56:11]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Faded Out
(User Rating: 1 )
by Incognito_Bombastus on
Tuesday, 13th January 2009 @ 12:13:21 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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who cut who off?
Shes now the background whose faded out. |
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Re: Faded Out
(User Rating: 1 )
by spanky on
Tuesday, 13th January 2009 @ 09:10:28 AM AEST
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a Message)
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This is a very poorly-written poem. You really need a lot of practice to improve your writing.
Maybe your poem would have been much better written as such:
Why did you leave me,
You son-of-a-gun!
And after you told me
That I was the one!
I'm sorry, my love,
If I'm coming off whiney,
But honest to Pete,
You're a pain in my heiney!
And while it is true
I'll be missing you so,
There is something,
My darling,
I'd like you to know...
And it's this:
You are nothing to me,
And as such, don't exist-
And by you, these two lips
Ne'er again shall be kissed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 |
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