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Unhuman
Contributed by
anonymous1212
on
Sunday, 11th January 2009 @ 02:08:31 PM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
A flow of oxygen,
An artificial life
Pumping into my blood stream
So much effort behind dried eyes.
Nothing comes easily now
With this burden of making things right
I just wish I could leave
Instead of trying so hard for an unwanted life
The tears that used to matter
Become just a daily routine
And the things I used to live for
Now seem so cold and unseen
Is it really to much to ask for,
To not have to fight through everyday
To smile to make everyone else happy
When all it does is get in my way
The cuts slowly let out the mess I really am
And I wish there was some way to make them understand
There’s no hope for this getting better
Without some artificial drug
And I’m beginning to drift farther away
From feeling other’s love
I don’t want to be some robot
My moods based all off one tiny pill
When it flows from my system
All built up will quickly spill
I have no reason to stay here
I’ve been gone for long anyways
The only thing that remains of me
Is a chemical put in each day
They could easily replace me
With anybody else
These emotions I’ve been having
I’m no longer myself
And there’s no reason from them to love me
No reason for them to care
I can’t keep a conversation
Without drifting into a stare
I have ideas that scare me
And I keep them to myself
I spend most of my time
Wishing I was someone else
This pain that I feel each day
Gets harder and harder to bare
I know that I’ve messed up before
But is this really fair?
I can’t get close to anyone
Because I just want to be alone
And my reasoning for distance
Is completely unknown
I have to lie about everything
To keep what’s left of normality
And stay away from doctors
Who just create another form of me
I’ve lost everything I once believed in
And who I really am
I’m starting to not remember
How it feels to understand
All that happens around me
Seems so unreal and unfair
The urges that I have
Are so difficult to bare
I only hang on to this life to keep everyone else okay
I wish I could do something to make myself feel better
If only for a day
I know my only solution
And its nearly impossible to achieve
Without hurting everyone around me
So I will just roll down my sleeve
Hide what I have done to myself
Cry behind closed doors
Play my music loudly
While I kneel onto the floor
Every action that makes me happy
Is a secret kept
So those among me
Cant see the pain behind the nights I’ve wept
I think its time for me to go now
But I don’t know what to do
For if I chose to end my life
My family may chose too
But hanging onto everyday
Living for someone else
Is driving me so far away
From the time I was once myself.
Copyright ©
anonymous1212
... [
2009-01-11 14:08:31]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Unhuman
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 11th January 2009 @ 09:23:24 PM AEST
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a Message)
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An incredibly powerful write.
One can feel this write from the first word to the last.
Sad but great writing.
Huggs, blessings, prayer,
emy |
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Re: Unhuman
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 12th January 2009 @ 02:58:06 PM AEST
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yes, very powerful. a riveting write, i was hooked right until the very end.
-phil |
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Re: Unhuman
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Tuesday, 13th January 2009 @ 09:21:39 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I feel you the entire way through this.
So sorry for the pain you feel.
The write is flowing and lovely though so painful within the beauty of its words.
Love N Hugs
Michelle |
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