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Autumn Leaves
Contributed by
Faithfully_a_Wallflower
on
Saturday, 29th November 2008 @ 11:49:48 AM in AEST
Topic:
LoveRemembered
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In the quiet and the wind, rests the autumn leaves
Evolving through the days and changing everything she believes
They color up the world and put life into a scene
Racing toward the winter, but allowing life to play out in between
She can't see the dirt on him, but sees the hurt in me
She washes him with love and leaves me where I'm meant to be
Finding my way back home again, basking in the external beauty of autumn
I almost come undone, from her similarity to the season, as I feel my legs go numb
She's the whisper in the wind, she's the rain on my parade
She's the hollowness inside my heart, and all the mistakes I've made
But I can't get her from my head, she's locked inside without a key
Still sometimes it's good to have her there because I get sick of me
It’s such a daunting task to look at her, without reading in her eyes
So she swore not to hurt me if I didn't love her out loud, and we called it the compromise
Autumn air reminds me of what it was like to love without an end
But as these days slip away, our hearts break less every day, but never start to mend
And I've got a deep scar that covers my heart and tells of weary days
Feeling of winter, but autumn's still pure, falling into fall's old ways
She's the love in the summer, she's that spark igniting passion in the moment
She's the angel cleansing all the air, she's the one where my life went
Copyright ©
Faithfully_a_Wallflower
... [
2008-11-29 11:49:48] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Autumn Leaves
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Saturday, 29th November 2008 @ 10:52:07 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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While this is certainly a bit heart breaking but very poetic. I loved the metaphor and the transitions you made from her to autumn. I love the way you captured the feeling of nostalgia even though it casts sadness a bit. Even sad nostaligia is important. This was really a well put together work all around. I also loved the flow.
BRAVO!
SCM |
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Re: Autumn Leaves
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Sunday, 30th November 2008 @ 09:45:13 AM AEST (User
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"But as these days slip away, our hearts break less every day, but never start to mend"
That line was exquisitely painful to me. This whole piece speaks of the sadness of loss
and the ache of an emptiness that never quite leaves us. This kind of emotion is like
being in a room with no doors or windows. Suffocating.
The last two lines are almost a comfort, compared to the rest. There exists a warmth
in them that serves as remembrance of the magnificence that can be ours.
Well done!!
~ Breezy
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Re: Autumn Leaves
(User Rating: 1 ) by ladyfawn on
Sunday, 30th November 2008 @ 05:12:53 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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sadly beautiful... excellent writing,
hugs n' love nessa |
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