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7-10-7
Contributed by
ladyfawn
on
Friday, 28th November 2008 @ 12:00:25 PM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
when the sun refused to shine
i did not mind just laid the world behind
my heart sang without a sound
~*~
a poem to hang on the stars
i miss him every single day and night
world knows im dying deeply
~*~
my human condition blows
im so sorry im living without him
years drone on myriad ways
~*~
some people hide from the truth
oh, rare bird i know of your loneliness
i wish you good company
~*~
owning more rings than fingers
prose that must fit my personality
dwelling behind the shadows
~*~
i have no feathers to fly
he was as deep as deep could ever be
my dusty mind sweetens time
~*~
i say a prayer to the wind
oh, please that love and i will meet again
living on time's carrousel
~*~
when the sun refused to shine
usually i do not believe it
for on it lies like the moon
§* *§
*|*
Twilight - Bellas Song Mp3
Copyright ©
ladyfawn
... [
2008-11-28 12:00:25]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by razorbladekisses on
Friday, 28th November 2008 @ 12:21:38 PM AEST
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I love this. Its very good. I look foreward to more of your work.
One question: how does the title relate to the story?
Jessi |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Friday, 28th November 2008 @ 12:27:24 PM AEST
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| 7-10-7 syllables in each stanza:) |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by razorbladekisses on
Friday, 28th November 2008 @ 12:44:07 PM AEST
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Oh, I get it.
Clever(; |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Friday, 28th November 2008 @ 01:53:48 PM AEST
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Awww Ness....this is really touching... Glad to see you posting again..
Hope you had a great Thanksgiving....
Oh..and Belated Birthday Greetings...
Hugs
Jenni |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Loende on
Friday, 28th November 2008 @ 04:15:43 PM AEST
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Cleaver and poignant. A lyrical and heartfelt read.
Sometimes we need to make our own gravity.
Be well,
Loende |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by myheartsvoice on
Friday, 28th November 2008 @ 07:29:34 PM AEST
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Such a heartfelt peace, each line,
affecting me as i read it, a gentle
healing to you my friend, lovely
as always . . .
((((Nessa))))
Ben . . . |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Friday, 28th November 2008 @ 07:39:54 PM AEST
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Nessa,
I wrote out my heart-n-soul in a coment.
The **** computor ate it. Drives me nuts when that happens.
Any way I'll just say, you are amazing to have have such beautifull heart-n-soul. Such tragedy has givien you wisdom and remarkable strength.
We meet many folks hear together but some jus reach deep into the haert and show us such tender, mercyfull, touching luv inside.
I'm just gratefull to be your friend.
Luvs ya girl,
emy |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by navydocny on
Friday, 28th November 2008 @ 08:08:44 PM AEST
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Consummate artistry as always...
I don't think that I breathed while reading it....
Great work here....
Thank You for this...
Steve |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 29th November 2008 @ 06:26:35 PM AEST
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| This one really tugs at the ol' heart strings. Beautifully sad and is definitely "a poem to hang on the stars". |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 29th November 2008 @ 07:46:27 PM AEST
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Wow! Potently emotional write!
I had to re-read this a few times because so many lines stand out that I would sit on them and lose myself. This is sad but damn magical. It is a very vulnerable work. Poets are at their best when they are at their most vulnerable. You are indeed at your best here. Which considering the body of your work....well it's damn exceptional! I really wanted to quote lines here but I would practically be re-writing the enitre poem minus only some linking lines. And that's pointless. For crying out loud anyone who reads this has read the poem, lol.
Excellent job!
SCM |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 30th November 2008 @ 07:44:31 AM AEST
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Oh Nessa!!! That last stanza nearly broke my heart. How horrid to think of
the lying moon. Sometimes I just prefer to live in the dreamworld of my
own making, you know?
Damn, sweetie, this was so heart wrenching. There is pain that swells up
to the point where we cannot think, eat, sleep or see straight, and then
there is this. This, that no amount of words could tell. It defies description.
It knows a lonely that LONELY doesn't know; it knows an ache that
the deepest thorn could not create; it knows an emptiness that the grandest
black hole can't comprehend. Damn fine writing my friend. I hope all is well.
Praying, hoping and wishing for you ... @-->--------
*hugs you tight*
~ Breezy
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Rali_Shayne on
Monday, 1st December 2008 @ 12:12:03 AM AEST
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This is a wonderful poem. It is a captivating material in the eyes of a reader and lends such familiarity to a hopeless romantic like myself. I am proud to have read such a work as there are no cliches and it stands on it's originality in flow, vocabulary, and emotional structuring. This is great writing. Thank you for sharing it.
God, Love, Muse
~ Rali Shayne |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 8th December 2008 @ 06:30:03 PM AEST
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| This is a beautiful poem. I truly enjoyed reading it! |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 8th December 2008 @ 06:30:05 PM AEST
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| This is a beautiful poem. I truly enjoyed reading it! |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Puppy_dog_eyes on
Thursday, 29th January 2009 @ 08:04:12 AM AEST
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There are so many great lines in this it is hard to pick a favourite stanza.
So simply I'll just say all of them.
Excellent work yet again
Steve |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 9th March 2009 @ 11:10:18 AM AEST
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Difficult to read in that it's so heartbreaking.
The depth of your pain and longing is expertly conveyed. |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on
Saturday, 16th May 2009 @ 10:47:09 PM AEST
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My dear friend Ladyfawn Nessa,
I could the feel the pain in your heart dear.
That same pain that I've felt for years with a tear.................
You have such a lovely way of placing your hurtful heart where all can feel and see it.
Thank you for all your help dear one.......
I'm back now.........we're going to have lots of fun!
Warm love
consue
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by myheartsvoice on
Saturday, 22nd August 2009 @ 11:28:08 PM AEST
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Beautiful and touching at the same time,
as always nessa, lovely as well as most
overwhelming in it's sad reality . . .
thank you like wise 4 your read and comment
((((Nessa))))
Ben |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 24th August 2009 @ 04:41:05 PM AEST
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| This is lovely poem. I enjoyed it! |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Xjordanary on
Monday, 24th August 2009 @ 08:22:55 PM AEST
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| simply inspirational.... O_O |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Flex4life13 on
Wednesday, 28th May 2014 @ 07:27:36 PM AEST
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| A human condition is always brought up alongside suffering it seems, ironic huh? Beautiful thought pattern, lookit, I took your advice and am being proactive :). Keep up the great work! |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by colinb on
Thursday, 5th June 2014 @ 01:27:58 AM AEST
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| your poetry always reaches the heart & soul excellent |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Monday, 20th October 2014 @ 08:57:41 AM AEST
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So heartfelt, and your sorrow is palatable. The day will come when you and your love are reunited. Have faith. Time is moving forward, whether it feels like it, or not. What a bevy of beautiful, moving poetry you will one day share with your true love.
Big hugs.
~Scorp |
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Re: 7-10-7
(User Rating: 1 )
by Beyfoxman5 on
Thursday, 1st January 2015 @ 03:53:11 PM AEST
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My heart sings without a sounds, as you wrote in this poem. You just know how to put things together.
Best,
Fox |
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