|
Menu
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
Open Up The Sky
Contributed by
lostinmyself
on
Saturday, 11th October 2008 @ 07:24:18 AM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
Please open up the sky,
and let me fall into the void,
left behind by all the stars.
Let the moon stand guard against the sun,
and never show another day,
I need no light to lead my way,
just let me sit here in the dark,
then when I cry no one will see,
and I will think a while...
just my night, and me.
Copyright ©
lostinmyself
... [
2008-10-11 07:24:18] (Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment. That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Saturday, 11th October 2008 @ 08:04:40 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Oh Sweetie!!! (I can see why you wanted to use the Emerson quote-- very befitting)
I'm so glad to be reading another new piece by you. And this is a perfect lostinmyself write, if you know
what I mean. There is melancholy in this, but I do not feel sad. Somehow there is solace in the night, even if it
encounters tears, you know? I can't tell you how impressed I am with your work, (each and every time) and
if you only knew how many times, "gosh! I wish I'd written that" crosses my lips, you'd be amazed!
This is so powerful for so brief a write. Sometimes I believe the brevity of a write is what MAKES it stand
out. It is forced to impress the reader sooner and with more impact. Your work is always a sensational read.
Regardless of genre or sentiment. And I look forward to them with genuine enthusiasm. THIS piece, is why.
Remarkable sweets. As always and exactly what I come to expect from you every time.
loves you
*hugs*
~ Breezy
|
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by Jenni_K on
Saturday, 11th October 2008 @ 11:13:23 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Amazing write, Lost... A sad piece but with a hint of promise of a better life..
Jenni |
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Sunday, 12th October 2008 @ 12:13:16 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I love this poem, I can get a vivid picture
and I think that every poem to be
good should be vivid and this one certainly is!
It feels like a fresh starry night! |
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Sunday, 12th October 2008 @ 12:55:17 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
You may feel you need to add
quantity to this Phill, but as for
quality, never my brilliant friend,
brownning's got nothing on you.
beautiful work as always i would
exspect no less . . .
liewise thank you 4 your read
and comment, take care . . .
Ben . . .
|
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by emystar on
Monday, 13th October 2008 @ 03:15:06 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Awesome work, my friend.
Huggs, smiles, blessings,
emy |
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 15th October 2008 @ 02:38:34 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Though I may be far away and the night is dark, still I can hear the sobbing, and it echoes...
Beautifully done sis. |
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by Wachumiri on
Wednesday, 15th October 2008 @ 09:39:02 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I know exactly what you mean! My ocean, the way I lose myself in the waves, the rain, the tides, the crashing water. Your night is my ocean.
I really don't know what else to say to that, just that, with a grin, I know what you mean.
Take care you.
David |
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by rebelwcause on
Monday, 20th October 2008 @ 06:44:04 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
great write way to put your emotions out there i enjoyed it bravo |
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by outlawpoet on
Friday, 24th October 2008 @ 08:46:23 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
i like this poem mostly cause i can relate but its also a smooth read |
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Saturday, 8th November 2008 @ 10:05:16 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This is a very beautiful write and i feel this way myself, cursing the sun for shining when all I want is darkness. Awesome job! |
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by Loende on
Saturday, 15th November 2008 @ 09:47:05 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
You walk in beauty, like the night.
I love this poem, because I see you in it. It's a lovely, emotive piece that lives and breathes...
So you sit, and think a while. I'll watch you.
Love,
~dawn
|
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by ladyfawn on
Tuesday, 2nd December 2008 @ 02:00:04 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
absolutely beautifully stunning hun, powerful and gentle at the same time, by far one of my new favorites of yours,
hugs n' love nessa
@->>->- |
|
|
Re: Open Up The Sky
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 3rd December 2008 @ 01:27:48 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Wow!. I really like the way this is written. Short yet powerful with emotion and really great imagery....very visual emotions if that makes sense. Some sadness within this write and yet comfort while you take your thoughts in by yourself. Everyone needs a little alone time.
Take care and thank you for sharing this with us. You are a great poetess.
Tim
|
|
|
|