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Sir (I Could Swear I've Seen You Before )
Contributed by
allforyou
on
Monday, 1st September 2008 @ 04:19:14 AM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Excuse me, sir, but could you take this arrow out of my heart,
I seem to have been struck by some clandestine lover.
Sir, why do you look the other way?
If you could stop the bleeding, too, that'd do wonders for my ego;
I seem to have lost it in this slippy, little mess.
Sir, why do you treat this like a game?
There's a steady palpitation drumming through these rusty ducts,
I seem to have misunderstood beliefs to contemplate.
Sir, why don't you seek to understand?
Excuse me, sir, but could you shoot this arrow in my heart,
I seem to have misplaced my clandestine lover.
Sir, why do you look so familiar?
Copyright ©
allforyou
... [
2008-09-01 04:19:14]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Sir (I Could Swear I've Seen You Before )
(User Rating: 1 )
by eeeitak on
Monday, 1st September 2008 @ 10:28:00 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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ooh man, i LOVE this!
the constant of sir's and questions,
the similarities of the first and last stanza...
very well done, this poem is wonderful!
--Katie |
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Re: Sir (I Could Swear I've Seen You Before )
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Monday, 1st September 2008 @ 11:07:37 AM AEST
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a Message)
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awesome post,
it has a feel of sort of being confused and overwhelmed by a sudden feeling of misplaced love,
nice job
wiz |
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Re: Sir (I Could Swear I've Seen You Before )
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 1st September 2008 @ 01:34:29 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
Great write Kara. I love the conflicting
emotions and the set up. Reminds me of
The Reluctant Fundamentalist (have you
read it?) The entire book is told in first
person narration and the author calmly and
politely speaks with heart wrenching
honesty. That's the same feeling I get from
this, the polite manners and word choice
beautifully depicting a wild emotion. Well
done.
~Jesse |
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