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Concrete Skyline
Contributed by
sorrowsofabrokenheart
on
Monday, 7th July 2008 @ 04:59:23 PM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
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City lights steal the glory from the star lit sky
A perfect hill top view, of a romantic skew of lies
The streets below filled with tears and panic
A call to remember, but I love you was lost in the static
Is this what you’ve come to fear the most
The lonely drive home down the same empty road
Your radio reminding you your still alone
Laying your head down at night, with no one at your side
Waking to the torment of this silence
And a sun rise thats hidden behind the shadow of a concrete skyline
Copyright ©
sorrowsofabrokenheart
... [
2008-07-07 16:59:23]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Concrete Skyline
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Monday, 7th July 2008 @ 06:51:34 PM AEST
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Very deep, awesome write.
huggs,
emy |
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Re: Concrete Skyline
(User Rating: 1 )
by inlovewithaladd on
Monday, 7th July 2008 @ 10:02:41 PM AEST
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Your radio reminding you your still alone
loved that line. |
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Re: Concrete Skyline
(User Rating: 1 )
by Oceandreamer on
Monday, 7th July 2008 @ 10:07:25 PM AEST
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Loved this one!
I can totally relate to this poems...
I like the way you toss the reader about
with the interesting twists & contrast of emotions -
"A perfect hill top view, of a romantic skew of lies
The streets below filled with tears and panic"
Nice.... I like it!
~~Oceandreamer~~ |
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Re: Concrete Skyline
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Tuesday, 8th July 2008 @ 01:41:21 AM AEST
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nicely done,
wiz |
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Re: Concrete Skyline
(User Rating: 1 )
by sprinter27 on
Tuesday, 8th July 2008 @ 03:48:00 AM AEST
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Awesome write. The emotions that seep from your work are astounding and this all makes total sense. And one thing i have to say: the Jackhammer is one of Concrete's worst enemies. This is a great work and something i have to say is don't dwell, love will come: enjoy your time, be yourself, and love will come. Keep up the great work!
~sprints |
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Re: Concrete Skyline
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostrelic on
Tuesday, 8th July 2008 @ 07:10:36 AM AEST
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| a good write like the images and the snicker at the side of your mouth |
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Re: Concrete Skyline
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Tuesday, 8th July 2008 @ 07:16:29 AM AEST
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Strong and vivid details and images in this write.
I loved the concrete skyline.
Beautiful work
Michelle |
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Re: Concrete Skyline
(User Rating: 1 )
by wheels on
Saturday, 26th July 2008 @ 10:46:06 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I will have to say this for you - wow.
you have a beautifull use of imagery
--kevin
the lonely vagabond |
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