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The Storm
Contributed by
eeeitak
on
Monday, 30th June 2008 @ 12:35:19 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
Rain clouds holding back their tears
They’ve been open in weakness for a thousand years
But now’s the time to be strong?
They’ve been waiting to prove themselves for so long
We’re not weak we’re not weak we’re not weak
It’s all a fake
The clouds break
The water comes in a downpour
Drowning us , and we’re not so strong anymore
The storm consumes us
Depression becomes us
As we are swallowed by the clouds
Copyright ©
eeeitak
... [
2008-06-30 12:35:19]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadwriter on
Tuesday, 1st July 2008 @ 01:53:19 AM AEST
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a Message)
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This is a great piece. I enjoyed it.
Deadwriter
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Re: The Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Tuesday, 1st July 2008 @ 02:03:48 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Good analogy... I could almost feel the storm..
Jenni |
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Re: The Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 19th July 2008 @ 04:30:08 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Everything about this poem is most heart warming in a solomn way, your style is real
and your writting is narritive and brings a
most comforting feel to the reader, beautiful flow and yet it does not take away from the emotion you are conveying, you write for
the heart to feel, and the soul, to read . . .
Ben
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Re: The Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Sunday, 20th July 2008 @ 01:30:00 PM AEST
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nicely done... so full of emotion
wiz |
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Re: The Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 2nd August 2008 @ 04:42:56 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| What a great metaphor, and beautifully written. Your style is so... poetic! Nature seems to be quite an inspiration to you and it really brings an elegance into all of your pieces. Thank you! |
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Re: The Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by zenith66 on
Tuesday, 2nd September 2008 @ 10:17:33 AM AEST
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WOW! this was anohter extremly unique take on clouds, you focused more on THEIR emotions rather than outs towards them, i found that wholly interesting and very very effective, love how it soundslike they are trying to prove themselves it was very nicely done!!
great work!! you've got some great talent, there a deep emotion i can feel in your work and i love that!! |
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