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Cutting deep

Contributed by maggot on Tuesday, 24th June 2008 @ 09:37:06 AM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry

why is my life so miserable
why does everything go so terribly wrong
why did she have to die
because now i can't forget
trapped in my misrey unable to comprehend whats happened
you said in time i will forget
but this pain is just to real
something that time can not erase

so i sit here with a blade in my hand
i feel the razor sharp metal slice through my skin
cutting deep
the blood runs down my arm
and the pain is numbed
mum walks in and screams at the sight of the blood pooling on the floor
and runs down stairs
next thing i know im in the hospital
in a psych ward.

Copyright © maggot ... [ 2008-06-24 09:37:06]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Cutting deep (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 24th June 2008 @ 07:42:47 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

The last two lines of the first stanza are painfully close to the Evanessence song. You might want to change those. The drama and abrupt ending are nice. Keep writing.

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