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the afterbirth of delirium

Contributed by elle on Wednesday, 4th June 2008 @ 01:48:30 AM in AEST
Topic: spiritual

I wade through the afterbirth
of delirium. . .
as droplets of calm,
like sweat,
begin to bead
upon my brow.
shattered awareness
rests with me
& I, restless,
attain a breaching of chance,
of circumstance,
but not the peace. . .
the peace. . . so my longing.
were we panting? raving on?
while breeding
a mere moral discontent . . ?
a delinquent substitute
for reality, for what's real?
or perhaps. . . a thing
more sinister to abide in?
a chilling place of worship,
suffocatingly simple
to achieve. . .
a morphing of ourselves
to a conformation
of contempt. . ?
I, no longer willing
to attempt, carelessly
this life, unready & unable
to relinguish my soul
only to greet death. . .
I am not willing.
I halt at heavens' gateway,
heavy heart. . . in an empty hand.
what colour is my pain?
a rhapsody
of a prismed hue. . .
quiet suffering. . .
the end, long overdue.
is it more painful than yours?
more primitive
in its' being. .?
more prominent
in its' hiding. .?
meditated & calculating
in its' undoing. . ?
awkward & barren
raw, when exposed.
it does not serve. . .
what measure do we use
to contemplate? what mindset
to discern our needs?
I feel faint
at the gnawing thought
of discovery.
the freedom of nothing
else to question,
not myself,
or any other. . .
a breathless, gentle freeing.
silent in its' strength.
do you feel me,
recognize me
in the gap?
that moment between
understanding
& the knowing you understand.
it is only the shadow
of a shadow.
the awareness
of our awareness.
the form of all formation .
a tempting of attempt. . .
micro-time. . . it is only
spinning. . . condensing
all the fiber
of our knowledge
into a pleasant sigh. . .
one of resolve & of relief,
a faint indication
of my humanness
& the divine thread
simple in its' purpose.
a bond of no binding
too tender to undo.
timeless, constant
seeking
creative to exhaustion
manifests
itself in peace.

Copyright © elle ... [ 2008-06-04 01:48:30]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: the afterbirth of delirium (User Rating: 1 )
by deadwriter on Wednesday, 4th June 2008 @ 05:54:08 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

This is like a whole lifetime condensed into one day or even an hour. Encompassing so much, yet leaving so many new paths open to explore.

Great read.

Deadwriter

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