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Betrayed

Contributed by maggot on Thursday, 29th May 2008 @ 02:21:49 PM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry

i thought we were friends
i thought i could trust you
but i was wrong
i learnt soon enuf after everything i told u started to go around
i knew it was u who was telling people cuz you were the only one i told
you would always try and play dumb and act like u didn't do anything
You say to me why don't you trust me any more
hmm i wonder why i dont trust you
u told my secrets and then lied and said you didn't do a thing
if you had admitted to doing maybe i would not be so angry at you
but you lied, you betrayed me..........

Copyright © maggot ... [ 2008-05-29 14:21:49]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Betrayed (User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on Saturday, 31st May 2008 @ 08:18:22 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

This write is full of strong emotion but there are words that take away from it. Like learnt, u enuf see what I am saying. It takes away from the poetic value of the write. If you cleaned it up a bit it would be much better.

It is easy when we are a text and messenger society to make shortcuts which is fine in those manners but really makes a wreck in our poetry in doing so.

Keep up the writing......

Michelle

You will also find people are not always what they say and pretend to be........ I learn this lesson over and over....... even some people here pretend a lot I do not engage in the childish games. You are better than that find the people who treat you with respect and earn your trust and are true and take nothing less! Life is to short to waste on people who are players, gossips and flakes!!

Hang tuff

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