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A Sunny Afternoon
Contributed by
catz77
on
Sunday, 4th May 2008 @ 02:14:07 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
.
Today I went out
I took a walk
Beneath the sun
A hole in my left sock
I skipped along
Over the dirt
I stepped on a rock
And oh how it hurt
I wanted to cry
My eyes were ready
When out of nowhere
Came my daddy
A deep laugh
And he smiled so wide
I pouted but he,
He tickled my sides
And so we laughed outdoors
And I began to run
He was catching up
Than it was done….
I stopped and turned
He was standing there
Like a barrier was stopping him
And so I stared
He’s still there
Behind that barrier
And we’ve grown apart
My frown permanent.
.
Copyright ©
catz77
... [
2008-05-04 14:14:07]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A Sunny Afternoon
(User Rating: 1 )
by holy on
Sunday, 4th May 2008 @ 03:36:11 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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| I love it, yes, it will flow better if read slowly.Good write! |
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Re: A Sunny Afternoon
(User Rating: 1 )
by a7x36 on
Sunday, 4th May 2008 @ 05:28:29 PM AEST
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a Message)
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quite bittersweet.
i liked the sweet part better :) |
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Re: A Sunny Afternoon
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 5th May 2008 @ 11:07:01 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| good write 3/5 |
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