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deep
Contributed by
zeroelysium
on
Wednesday, 12th March 2003 @ 11:40:00 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
deep in the mud,
locked in the mire,
how my mind conspires
how my heart thuds
how my body aches
at what you make
look at what you did
look at what i am
are your proud of your creation
or do you feel nothing
as you made me just like you
Copyright ©
zeroelysium
... [
2003-03-12 23:40:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: deep
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Wednesday, 12th March 2003 @ 11:45:17 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| ahhh i love this, great write! im taking it as dark poetry, that's how im seeing it, oh, and welcome to ypdc! im looking forward to seeing your next post, your writing friend always nessa |
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Re: deep
(User Rating: 1 )
by zeroelysium on
Thursday, 13th March 2003 @ 01:04:06 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| my first poem .. my first comment how cool .. 4 whole reads great ! woo ty nessa.. |
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Re: deep
(User Rating: 1 )
by ap on
Thursday, 13th March 2003 @ 03:48:25 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| nice... vague as the context is so unclear.. yet... thats part of the poems points of interest... ap |
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Re: deep
(User Rating: 0 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 13th March 2003 @ 07:59:10 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Welcome, nice work kid
Mom |
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Re: deep
(User Rating: 1 )
by wolfflow on
Thursday, 13th March 2003 @ 03:40:26 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| hmm, it keeps forming a circle in my mind as if you are talking to yourself or your alter ego, its interesting, i love the challenging feel of it |
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Re: deep
(User Rating: 1 )
by zeroelysium on
Thursday, 13th March 2003 @ 03:47:56 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| heh ty mom |
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Re: deep
(User Rating: 1 )
by zeroelysium on
Thursday, 13th March 2003 @ 03:49:10 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| my favorite thing is everybody sees thing i dont in my words.. ty comments are always welcome and dont be afraid to critize of uya think it sucks or anyhting |
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Re: deep
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Saturday, 15th March 2003 @ 10:29:06 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| i usually don't return to a poem i've read, but had to read this again, lol, hey and thanks for your comments on mine too! keep writing your great! huggs n love to you and yours:)always nessa |
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