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Who am I?

Contributed by 5minutepoet on Friday, 4th April 2008 @ 02:27:23 PM in AEST
Topic: AngryPoetry

Why,
Why do you feel it,
Are you something i should know,
None of you are,
None of you get this you cry,

Tears ,
Are these something slicks of sadness,
You think tangebility is a sign,
Can't you accept,
I have what you don't,
Rawness and aggression,

Bleed,
Is hate bad,
Will the depressed ever know,
We have what you don't,
Listen the brink of suicide creeps,
Smiles lack my true substance,

Cry ,
Tears stream with raw power,
Vernacular vulnerabilty,
Oppossed to you,
Scream vain your locks,
Cast down all expectations,

Think ,
Never dare look at me,
I talk to you,
When i talk ever at all,

If,
You don't deserve worthy,

Crawl,
You are that,
void or less in my world,
Can you cry a crimson tear,
I've dreamt things you ilk daren't imagine,
Paid for the pain ,
Found poverty through claret,
Wept a child abused i am,
Dare you think i hold no power,
All invites ignored,
All challenges met,
Tear what you can i need not the rest,
Come back until i die,

Die,
One time at a time,
Never the last,
Do you feel immortality,
Cheat the grasp of the,
Is almighty only a concept,
Do you know who i am?

Copyright © 5minutepoet ... [ 2008-04-04 14:27:23]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Who am I? (User Rating: 1 )
by yangdantien on Wednesday, 7th May 2008 @ 06:10:44 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I have read a few of your pieces and chose this one uncommented. In my own work the toughest part is learning the art of omission. There are phrases that leave the mind to turn corners filled with insight and others that have a strong flat linear direction and that is good. I am not grammatician and would not appreciate villanelle from sestina but I think in your case playing with poetic forms may give rise to the hidden diemsions that lurk in your prose.

Peace
AJ

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