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Achievements
Contributed by
tashy_mashy
on
Tuesday, 25th December 2007 @ 07:07:14 PM in AEST
Topic:
DreamsandWishes
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Life is all but many trials
obstacles from left to right
sometimes it is thought to be unfair
hope just seems to disappear
and the despair just settles in
why keep going on?
when there will be just another obstacle to conquer
but why give up?
you will never know what may come up
treasure the life you have
for it is the only one that you have got.
it is very possible to defeat this evil
as long as you don't give up.
keep trying and keep your chin up
cuz the deepest reward of it all is
Copyright ©
tashy_mashy
... [
2007-12-25 19:07:14] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Achievements
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Thursday, 3rd January 2008 @ 09:40:08 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
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i liked the overall hopeful tone. the only two lines id nitpick is "life is all but many trials" it doesnt really make sense and is unnecessarily wordy. and "it is very possible to defeat this evil" feels out of place since the evil youre referring to is never named or explained. |
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