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Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
Contributed by
Silent-No-More
on
Wednesday, 24th October 2007 @ 03:26:37 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
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Let them not see what I cannot hide
A torture too torturous to hold inside
My eyes down turned and wet with pain
The myriad of emotions I can’t contain
Let them not notice my shaking hands
The absent stare that deep thought demands
The sudden awareness of what I’ve done
The monster of monsters I can’t outrun
Let them not inquire if I will be okay
The question must wait for some other day
Lest I be tempted to speak of falling apart
Or of having broken my very heart
Let them not trouble themselves with me
I’m troubled enough and I can’t breathe
I need them to continue to pass on by
Ignoring my heartache, not hearing my cries
Oh, let them not see what I cannot hide
A torture too torturous to hold inside
The sweet, sweet sorrow, that yet remains
This pain, unbearable
and love, its name.
Copyright ©
Silent-No-More
... [
2007-10-24 15:26:37] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by Fionndruinne on
Wednesday, 24th October 2007 @ 03:50:37 PM AEST (User
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Wow, Snemma, this is one of the most sorrowful works I have read in a long time. It's every bit as eloquent as it needs to be, and more ten-dollar words wouldn't make it more than it is.
Powerful. Very, very.
Andrew |
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by fielding88 on
Wednesday, 24th October 2007 @ 08:01:05 PM AEST (User
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Well Snem, it's like the old Chinese proverb says:
"Eloquence provides only persuasion, but truth buys loyalty."
I think the abundance of sincerity in this piece doesn't necessarily require a complement of eloquence. The emotions came off as honest and (for want of another word) sincere, and I think in the end, that's what makes this poem stand without the need for eloquence; there's no need to persuade anyone, what with all the truthfulness here.
It's a very emotive poem you've written, Snem. Kudos on a job well done. |
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by deadheadpoet on
Wednesday, 24th October 2007 @ 11:01:53 PM AEST (User
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Oh Snem...this was beautifully written. The words themselves are so basic and down to Earth, everyone can surely relate to these feelings, these tortuous times. Anyone who has been in love, knows. The last stanza was so poetic, so right on.
"This pain, unbearable
and love, its name."
So much truth in that statement....
Thanks for sharing.
Peace and hugs,
Laura |
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Thursday, 25th October 2007 @ 02:29:45 AM AEST (User
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Poet, words I do not have this day to tell you just how, why, and where this piece not only touches me,
but downright grabs me and shakes my very core. And somehow, I know, the words you need not hear anyway.
I know, you know.
I also know that these monsters or demons you speak of, (as have others), have the softest blade when piercing
our skin, no? We shoo them away, only to plead with them to return. What is wrong with us, indeed? Love.
Yes, love. You said a hundred thousand things with that one word, alone. How tortured, but what a delicate
way to suffer. What a deliciously enticing feast for our souls to devour ... or is it be devoured by? wow. What
a concept that is, eh? My soul being devoured by the one thing I'd ADORE to become a part of ... love
I know of what it is you speak. And snemmy? You know, I wouldn't want it any other way.
Simple. Gripping. Beautiful. And just the way it is/was.
*hugs*
~Breezy |
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Thursday, 25th October 2007 @ 05:00:17 AM AEST (User
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Eloquence?
Give me five stanzas of out-pouring emotions
and I'll take them any day.Yes, love is a monster,an uncontrollable monster,and no cool-bravado'd facade can ever disguise the inner-turmoil it creates.
Bang on the button Snemmy, bang on the button.
Den
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by Rakerman1999 on
Thursday, 25th October 2007 @ 08:20:13 AM AEST (User
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My dear friend
I have felt this ".just leave me alone and let me drown in my pain" feeling before. Eloquence? The ability to place ones broken heart on the poetic stage and make the reader feel what you feel....that IS eloquence. I think you are at your personal best when you let the emotions move your pen.
I can offer you a shoulder
and roses at your feet
Larry |
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Thursday, 25th October 2007 @ 09:19:06 AM AEST (User
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What is so powerful about this piece is the very simple connecting of words to describe such a universal "pain" for so many different reasons.
"This pain, unbearable
and love, its name."
Yup, I've been several times to where you so beautifully captured the moment. Wonderful work.
wabl
KenMoore
cowboy |
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by brew on
Thursday, 25th October 2007 @ 11:49:22 AM AEST (User
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To let one give the other pain.....IM SORRY
I guess with my life, I havent much comfort , to words..I scream at all...sorry
I hate all who has to feel what alot of us do
why cant it be easy, I DONT know, why........again Im sorry, just smile, grit, and know.it gets better...........LOL!
HUGS brew~ |
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by Mama508 on
Friday, 26th October 2007 @ 03:01:14 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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wow.. that's beautiful...
Some people don't understand the pain of love and you wrote it very well...
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by Dom on
Saturday, 27th October 2007 @ 04:32:17 AM AEST (User
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If eloquence is being able to rob another of attempts at eloquence, then this piece is eloquence magnified. I read this earlier and didn't have the time to comment, on coming back to it now with ample time I find that I simply cannot comment at all!
All I can say is a very sincere I know what you mean completely, and hats off to you for an amazing, emotive write.
Take care,
Dom |
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by ladyfawn on
Sunday, 28th October 2007 @ 06:43:10 AM AEST (User
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touching... stunning... beautifully sad...
hugs n' love nessa
roses roses roses |
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by needledancing on
Tuesday, 30th October 2007 @ 12:22:59 AM AEST (User
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To hear the cracking of your own heart is one thing but to hear the cracking of anothers is truly a link to your humanity. What a powerful and touching write.
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Re: Sweet, Sweet Sorrow
(User Rating: 1 ) by FleurdeSang on
Sunday, 12th April 2009 @ 11:05:24 AM AEST (User
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If I may, I would love nothing more than to print this out and keep it near me.
This wrenched my heart out, and exposed the very anguish you speak of here. I too often feel this way, and love is not the culprit all the time. 'Tis an engulfing passion that remains without a host to receive it, and perhaps... perish from it, as I have. Your writing is gorgeous, whether you think it sloppy or less than brilliant. You always shine in my eyes, sweet friend. I hope your pain will lessen. Love is such a cruel affliction at times. Needless to say, I loved this. I hope I have your permission to print it out. *hugs*
Always,
Enthralled, and gently weeping,
~Stephy.
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