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Holding A Candle
Contributed by
Dom
on
Wednesday, 24th October 2007 @ 05:22:54 AM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
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When all the boats have left the harbour,
When all the stars fade slowly out,
When darkness fills the corners
Of the room with fear and doubt.
When my world seems feather-fragile,
Thistledown on frosted glass,
When it seems one breath would shatter
All I’ve tried so hard to pass.
When I feel my soul is yearning
Though I know close by are friends,
When I feel that what I’ve got
Is leagues from how I want to end.
Is the time to run the boat out
From the shores around my soul,
Time to moor and re-evaluate
The jigsaw as a whole.
I’m not expecting answers,
Questions haven’t come to mind,
Enlightenment, epiphanies
One does not simply find.
Some light, though, would be welcome,
Its been dusk for far too long.
A roof, some bread and water,
Loving hands to guide me on.
Copyright ©
Dom
... [
2007-10-24 05:22:54]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Wednesday, 24th October 2007 @ 05:50:01 AM AEST
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I loved the use of the boats and the harbor to relay your feelings that seem to be a generalized way many of us seem to feel. I don't know, Dom, something seems in the air, something strange, but I can't seem to put my finger on it.
I could of written these words(wish I would of, they're great)...the last stanza...wow, I understand the need for, "loving hands to guide me on". Thank you for sharing.
Well penned.
Peace and hugs,
Laura |
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 24th October 2007 @ 09:38:21 AM AEST
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" Some light, though, would be welcome, Its been dusk for far too long. A roof, some bread and water, Loving hands to guide me on. " This verse alone has more humility
than the whole of the bible. Never the less a most awesom poem in it's entireity. You
always put out great work, nice to see this
in such an emotionaly underestimated gender such as ours is . . . Take care
Thank you also for your read and comment.
Ben
bjps
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Nazmythian on
Wednesday, 24th October 2007 @ 02:28:31 PM AEST
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I fell into this passage ...
"When my world seems feather-fragile,
Thistledown on frosted glass,
When it seems one breath would shatter
All I’ve tried so hard to pass."
and continued dropping the whole way through.
If "Is the time to run the boat out
From the shores around my soul..." I wish you fair weather and warm winds, full sails and a working compass, that will allow for you to return home.
Nazzy ~
( always enjoying nautical themes and wonderful metaphore )
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 25th October 2007 @ 04:26:09 AM AEST
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A gentle,wistful melancholy sails through this poem.You ask for so little, that the reader is left hard-wishing that light and those loving hands to you.
It's a beautiful poem,perfect metaphor.
Den
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Sunday, 28th October 2007 @ 06:16:49 AM AEST
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breathtakingly; it runs soft across the soul...
hugs n' love nessa
roses |
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 29th October 2007 @ 01:19:06 AM AEST
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Dom, the essence of self can be so daunting at times. A confusion of decision, really. Reflection on why and
how circumstances surround us and what the best course for our futured circumstances is, can be such a
welcome moment. (Though, at times I feel it to be a most arduous task).
Your piece is a benchmark to the enormity of this emotion. It is so softly full of descriptions that
melt the soul like butter. There is a yearning here, but one that is more like a wish than a plea. And
with each stanza, each line, each word, the questions you do not ask, actually become more
clear. =)
Light is hope, shedding darkness like a confining skin, where we can finally breathe.
Excellent, EXCELLENT work poet!
~Breezy |
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Monday, 29th October 2007 @ 11:15:18 AM AEST
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I have to echo all the other comments here. This is beautifully crafted and still somehow feels so simple and eloquent and un-crafted, really. There are some striking lines here, an incredibly well employed metaphor and gosh, yes, the thoughtful, melancholy, quiet tone here is exquisite.
My comment here really doesn't do this justice. I'd encourage every reader to read this more than once... there is much to be appreciated. I've read it a number of times myself and am just so incredibly taken with the word choice, the expression, the essence... the entirety of this. Well, well done!!!
~Snemmy |
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Friday, 2nd November 2007 @ 09:18:49 AM AEST
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Soo-poib! (I'm in Chicago, so I gotta talk this way!) Your 'old soul' is shining through the youth of your years, Dom. I am really moved by this soliloquy, not just by the smooth construction but the familiar sentiments.
S. |
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by needledancing on
Sunday, 4th November 2007 @ 11:55:18 PM AEST
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| A truly touching piece of work that I must agree should be read many times and savoured. Each word put to perfection and filled with the most excellent heart humming message of what the soul experience is for this writer. Brilliantly done. Ahhhhhh....exhaling with admiration. |
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Sunday, 2nd December 2007 @ 05:08:46 PM AEST
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Taking my own advice, I suppose... I had to come back here.
I had a debate with someone once over what is and is not truly a necessity. As ridiculous as it may seem, the discussion included things like microwaves and stereos and what not. I wish, really, I had this poem to reference back then. I would have pointed to your closing lines and simply said, "That."
This piece still tugs at me. I suspect, really, that it will for a rather long time.
Sighing,
~Snemmy |
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 7th December 2007 @ 07:27:40 PM AEST
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Wow and completely wow again!
A soft and gentle brilliance and yes melancholy alltogether in the most beautiful way. This is an extraordinary use of elegance in quite still wording. Yet how damn moving and all together inspiring. A simply magnificent work of art. In truth to say more would not be right. This poem speaks for itself.
SUPERIOR!
SCM |
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Re: Holding A Candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Monday, 18th August 2008 @ 04:18:37 PM AEST
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Dearest Dom~
Wow, girl what can I say?
The poem speaks for itself.
A most heart touching write
beautifully crafted by the pen
of a very talented and special poetess~
A poem I will definitely find my way back to.
A tip of the hat to you~
huge hugs,
sue m
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