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damaged goods
Contributed by
evolon
on
Sunday, 9th September 2007 @ 12:06:21 PM in AEST
Topic:
drugabuse
|
Thinking of my life, as I begin to get sick
See.. my father’s a drug dealer
For her lust
My mother became a trick.
Conceived in thought of the worth of ten dollars
Mom missed her monthly, I became a thought
She tried to quit, said it was for me, “I remember those seven hours”
Flesh crawled and skin itched she tried to fight but as night fell she bought.
Five months pass, not even a thought now a worry
So many sunrises we cry, I cry for more
No one realizes she, mirrors mines as her eyes become blurry
I kick I pull I punch, she eats but that’s not what I want
Nothing craves my urge until sunset see us both scurry
Scrambling for change in the sofa, sold the t.v.
I kick I pull I punch wishing she would hurry
Every night he’s there in the shadows hiding from the cops
Gun in waist, pockets filled with money from heroin speed and rocks
Mom makes the purchase, exchange words on our way, systematic set your clock
My entire unborn life this has become our everyday with no intent to stop
Confined to my secure cell for six months now
My addiction fueled my need to liberate
I entered then exited the birth canal
Screaming out to my addiction tubes and I.V. ’s every 3 minutes seeing a doc
Confined yet again , isolated in now a see threw, heated box
Eight years into my life having trouble grasping how to read write
I was told special classes and teachings would help me threw life
I have not had the urge in years but sometimes my body yearns at night
Something is calling me and I am not sure what it is
Is god now testing me
Or is it the residual suffer from what mom did
She didn’t return yesterday. Dead! Consumed by the street
And the bitter cold of the night
A twisted tale called fate brought forth the reaper of my crave
Again into my life
As all four of us stand looking over her grave site
My addiction temporarily satisfied as I stand directly next to the man
Every one says I look like.
Now twenty two, Years have passed since mom has died
Grandparents put me out claiming it would help me gain pride
I filled out applications for jobs they never called.. I tried
Maybe because when asked if I graduated high school.. I lied
Society has no place for me a physically mature child
Released to the streets with no direction to run wild
Petty crimes just to eat I eventually married my addictive life style
I pray my life changes some day but it seems this is where I am for a while
I stand on the corner of the block
I got what you need heroin, speed to rocks
Lurking in the shadows attempting to elude three hot and a cot
My all for sale in exchange for what ever you got
Pockets filled with the profits from what I haven’t used yet
Living for today no regard for life no worries no regret
She approached with a twenty dollar need and only ten dollars short
Compromised by need, sex appeal her only and last resort
The mix of addiction and lust a child now conceived
Ironic a act on middle ground pleased two ten dollar needs
My father a drug dealer my mother a trick
Born by a prostitutes need, a drug dealers greed
Thinking of my life, as I begin to get sick
Damaged goods
Copyright ©
evolon
... [
2007-09-09 12:06:21]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: damaged goods
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 9th September 2007 @ 03:56:18 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
This is heart wrenchingly sad yet a masterpeice. I'm sure it was very hard for you to write this.
It's really sad how your grand parents did you. Just maybe (if it's your moms parents) that had a lot ot do with how your mom got on the wrong track.
Hang in there friend. I'll keep you in my prayers.
luv, huggs, faith, hope, joy, peace,
emy |
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Re: damaged goods
(User Rating: 1 )
by Shattered_soul on
Monday, 10th September 2007 @ 07:29:18 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Oh wow.
people like myself
they always think they have had it bad
they hate their past
the people
the life
forget it often
but I always think I have a bad life
until I learned that I was one of the lucky few.
I am sorry you have been through all of this you know.
and I dont sympathise you
I envey you
you are strong
stronger then most.
and I am sure that your life will turn better
in the end.
*blahzay blahzay.. i know* |
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Re: damaged goods
(User Rating: 1 )
by Mama508 on
Tuesday, 23rd October 2007 @ 09:00:10 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| wow... that is beautifully written and i can relate to the addiction.. awesome work... |
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