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BURN BABY BURN
Contributed by
xxbreathlessx
on
Tuesday, 12th June 2007 @ 01:18:48 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
Your hot kiss makes me sweat
And your hands feel like fire
Forever branding your touch into my skin.
I feel weak as the heat of your breath
Melts away my thoughts
And you grab my heart with both hands,
Such a seductively disgusting scene
As in the rush of love my heart becomes yours
And im sinking into everything that is you.
I’ve become yours
And with each kiss and bite you welcome me
Into this hell.
I can barely breathe knowing that this
To you means nothing.
That I to you mean nothing,
But another one captured,
Another fool gained.
No one kisses me like you do,
No one lies to me like you do,
No one breaks me like you do.
Its so hot I can barely stand the heat,
I myself am close to catching fire,
I’m close to dying
With my heart in your hands.
Help me escape,
I must escape.
You laugh and tell me im free to go whenever I please.
Oh how I please to go now
And I wish to go
And I try to go….
But in my frenzy to escape I failed to realize…
I’m already on fire,
Sweating surrender into the bouts of your
Hell.
Copyright ©
xxbreathlessx
... [
2007-06-12 13:18:48]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: BURN BABY BURN
(User Rating: 1 )
by fadingaway on
Tuesday, 12th June 2007 @ 03:45:33 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| I like the way you encorperated the light and dark....makes for a more intereasting read. full of emotion. |
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Re: BURN BABY BURN
(User Rating: 1 )
by Tot on
Tuesday, 12th June 2007 @ 11:45:32 PM AEST
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| This is full of raw emotion~ couldn't take my eyes off of it until I was done~ excellent~Tot |
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Re: BURN BABY BURN
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 13th June 2007 @ 08:41:55 AM AEST
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a Message)
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This....IS POETRY! Your metaphor for a one sided love afair being a hell (but sometimes a welcomed hell) is breath taking and wuite real, and yes deeply poetic. The third, fourth, and fifth stanzas (the poems meat) melt the opening and final sentiments together well creating and all out amazing work of love proclamation one that I feel most people will not challenge in words due to the extreme vulnerability of admitting that sometimes we play the fool on purpose. While there is a torment (and indeed it is hell) we need this to feel alive from time to time. And sometimes it seems there is no greater love than the one we create in our own imaginations and try to allow manifest in the flesh of another. You should be damn proud of this work. I will be anxiously looking forward to more.
SUPERB!
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