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dying anonymous
Contributed by
glassicallyunsuperficial
on
Monday, 2nd April 2007 @ 11:13:29 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
stranger land was where he died
the road was long
high was the tide
No one there knew his name
it didn't matter he had fame
a stranger to his stranger land
buried into stranger sands
no one even held his hand
as he took his last one breathe
Tears were scarce
no one made a fuss
The melancholic withering
of a man in a strange land
there is no murderer coming to repent
no books of instructions
no proper strange traditions to adhere
to.
He was simply blasted
into no limbs no head no skeleton
but pure sand and ash and dirt
merged with the organic soil
and sent to interwine with the origins
the land he once toiled.
Copyright ©
glassicallyunsuperficial
... [
2007-04-02 23:13:29] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: dying anonymous
(User Rating: 1 ) by heaviestcat on
Tuesday, 3rd April 2007 @ 09:01:41 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I like the idea of the poem ,But the rhyme scheme abruptly disappears thus throwing off the reader. |
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Re: dying anonymous
(User Rating: 1 ) by Bolts on
Tuesday, 1st February 2011 @ 08:05:33 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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not sure i agree with the comment below. to my mind the change of rhyme works very well. A really good poem! |
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