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the old man,and the kid
Contributed by
tawakwan
on
Tuesday, 25th February 2003 @ 04:40:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
"You look sad old one".
"I lived a life alone.Society has been my foe.I fought for freedom of mind.I've done many a thing in my time".
"Then you should feel lucky,for you have shined".
"For luck there has been no time.My life has been a prison,and I await only to die".
"But you are healthy and full of life".
"You judge this book by it's cover,how kind".
"Do you think when I am older,that I will see the things that you have seen?"
"My son at your age,i'd wish for better things..........
Copyright ©
tawakwan
... [
2003-02-25 04:40:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: the old man,and the kid
(User Rating: 1 )
by Varro on
Tuesday, 25th February 2003 @ 03:40:44 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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I like the exchange of dialogue. It is unique. A verteran of life passing on his harsh exeriences to a youth. It was just the right length also. You got the point across without overstating it. Very nice piece.
Varro |
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Re: the old man,and the kid
(User Rating: 1 )
by addie on
Wednesday, 26th February 2003 @ 06:40:23 AM AEST
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a Message)
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tooo good ... awesome ... the last two lines .... convey a very deep message ... really liked this one ...
keep dem comin
take care
addie |
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Re: the old man,and the kid
(User Rating: 1 )
by tawakwan on
Friday, 28th February 2003 @ 04:34:31 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| thank you very much.i apprecieate the kind words |
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Re: the old man,and the kid
(User Rating: 1 )
by tawakwan on
Friday, 28th February 2003 @ 04:35:47 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| your too kind addie.lots of love to ya |
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