|
Menu
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
Insecuriosity Killed the Spirit
Contributed by
ashleigh
on
Saturday, 3rd March 2007 @ 12:04:31 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
Scars and bruises fade with time
But the pain is forevermore
With livid visions of sacrifice
Each day becomes a chore
Some days may be easy
As some days may be hard
But nights are long as eternity
The mattress, it seems, is sharp
Someday I will tell you
What I am going through
But right now just look me in the eyes
And say you see me too
I've given it time, I've given it thought
But thought don't make it true
For I know not whether I'm better off
With or without you.
Copyright ©
ashleigh
... [
2007-03-03 12:04:31] (Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment. That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Insecuriosity Killed the Spirit
(User Rating: 1 ) by Dom on
Sunday, 4th March 2007 @ 09:05:23 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I really liked the rhythm of this, made it easy to read. I loved the line 'the mattress, it seems, it sharp' its a very vivd image of discomfort, eloquently expressed.
Dom |
|
|
Re: Insecuriosity Killed the Spirit
(User Rating: 1 ) by Silent-No-More on
Sunday, 4th March 2007 @ 04:32:34 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I write almost exclusively in the wee hours myself and absolutely agree that near about everything (if not everything!) is sharper in the night, mattresses included (*wink*). Sadly.... pain seems to be as well and doubt, too, has quite a bite to it then.
The whole of this piece is telling and, in many ways, relatable for this reader. I always hope that dawn will bring a different perspective or some kind of conclusion, but it doesn't always. I do so hope for you, that it did.
Take care,
~Snemmy
|
|
|
Re: Insecuriosity Killed the Spirit
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 6th March 2007 @ 06:22:23 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I felt the emotion float out the page while reading this very eloquently written poem. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Maybe you should write more poetry at 3 AM, as you are really very talented. : )
- Marisa |
|
|
|