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Carousel
Contributed by
keilantra
on
Saturday, 24th February 2007 @ 07:37:23 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
___________________
It’s been two years
and you still like to take me to abandoned theme parks
in the middle of the night-
Climb over the fences and turn on all the rides.
The carousel always was your favorite,
the way you sat on that lion and watched the world spin.
And me, I would watch
blank - eyed and long skirt flailing in the wind,
a ghost.
The only difference
between now and then is that these days,
I replace my skirts with
dark pants so I can climb to the top of the merry-go-round
To get as close to heaven
as I possibly can.
Copyright ©
keilantra
... [
2007-02-24 19:37:23]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Carousel
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Saturday, 24th February 2007 @ 07:51:51 PM AEST
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a Message)
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A very beautifull scene you painted with words.
Awesome.
big huggs,
emy |
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Re: Carousel
(User Rating: 1 )
by iodinelove on
Saturday, 24th February 2007 @ 11:49:27 PM AEST
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i liked it
i('m) ston(ed)
i liked it
^_^
always, abraham |
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Re: Carousel
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Sunday, 25th February 2007 @ 10:02:22 AM AEST
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My goodness, kei... I have to confess I'd have no idea how to respond were you to offer to share the story of what brought this to the page. The imagery that you've given us with these words is remarkably clear (an abondoned theme park... a carousel... the transition of the scene from the second to the third stanza... yes, yes!). But, the interpretation of what those images mean, has been left to the reader. I, for one, like that very much. Metaphorically, I think this is brilliant, unique and incredibly well crafted. So, yeh... were you to offer, kei... I'd struggle to know how to respond. I so completely adore the way this left me feeling and the thoughts it evoked, that I stubbornly want to hold on to them and do not wish them overwritten, you know?
Again, dear... I thank you for offering work of this caliber. It is, truly, nourishment for a hungry soul.
~Snemmy |
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Re: Carousel
(User Rating: 1 )
by Loriann on
Sunday, 25th February 2007 @ 10:12:39 AM AEST
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I enjoyed reading this. Your words were so strong I can envision this in my mind very clearly. Amazing job.
Loriann |
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Re: Carousel
(User Rating: 1 )
by yangdantien on
Sunday, 25th February 2007 @ 04:57:36 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Jaques Brel is alive and well and living at YPDC
Excellent & Beautiful
Peace
Yangdantien
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Re: Carousel
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Sunday, 25th February 2007 @ 10:30:05 PM AEST
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a Message)
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your imagery was great! such a great tale... its brevity and lack of superfluous words made this a true masterpiece...
nicely done,
wiz |
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Re: Carousel
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Friday, 23rd March 2007 @ 07:17:00 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Kei~
Boy can you deliver the most oustanding writes that I ever have read. Your unique style
of writing is amazing and the end result of your work is brilliant. You're a truly gifted
poetess my dear friend and may your pen
always flow so fluently with such brilliant
masterpieces. Top notch, thanks for sharing
Kei~
love n hugs,
sue m |
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Re: Carousel
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 8th April 2007 @ 11:33:29 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Enchanting and mysterious,written with such a gentle touch,a soft sadness..You captured me totally here,
Den |
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