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The World
Contributed by
tier
on
Saturday, 22nd February 2003 @ 01:00:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
I wish I could understand this world we live in, because that would make things a hella lot easyier to live in because of the pain we deal with everyday the stuff we see and the pain we feel the cuts we get from slicing out wrist the blood that flows from our skin that covers our body that we have to deal with our whole life.....but now some of you ignorant people wouldn't know the pain I speak of the pain that we all hold in our hearts the pain that makes us scream in the darkness of our dreams the dreams that we wake up and they never come true or the blank thoughts of destruction. You wish you could understand my words but until you feel the blood flow from your body you'll never see the pain I speak of for you are blind.........
Copyright ©
tier
... [
2003-02-22 01:00:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The World
(User Rating: 1 )
by Percursors on
Saturday, 22nd February 2003 @ 01:35:37 AM AEST
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a Message)
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This is really good, I loved it but when u write it’s easier to read if u enter between rhymes like...
I wish I could understand this world we live in
because that would make things a hella lot easier to live in
because of the pain we deal with everyday
the stuff we see
and the pain we feel
the cuts we get from slicing out wrist
the blood that flows from our skin
that covers our body that we have to deal with our whole life
but now some of you ignorant people wouldn't know the pain I speak of
the pain that we all hold in our hearts
the pain that makes us scream in the darkness of our dreams
the dreams that we wake up and they never come true
or the blank thoughts of destruction
You wish you could understand my words but until you feel the blood flow from your body you'll never see the pain I speak of
for you are blind......... |
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Re: The World
(User Rating: 1 )
by roisin on
Saturday, 22nd February 2003 @ 10:48:49 AM AEST
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sometimes it's hard for people to empathize with others...and yes sometimes they can't until they've felt the pain themselves...a good write
rosie |
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Re: The World
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dani on
Saturday, 22nd February 2003 @ 08:30:54 PM AEST
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| Very good... I'm in agreement with you....:) |
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Re: The World
(User Rating: 1 )
by karoody on
Sunday, 23rd February 2003 @ 02:13:37 AM AEST
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| it is hard to find someone who understands. but keep looking around, for you are not alone. yes, roses have thorns....but you may not appreciate the rose's beauty without them. |
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Re: The World
(User Rating: 1 )
by Percursors on
Sunday, 23rd February 2003 @ 02:51:20 PM AEST
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| I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to come off as “u need to change” becuz’ that’s not what I meant! I though your poem was really great and u show a lot of talent, I was just giving u a suggestion on the way “I” think I would be better but as u say it’s really up to you, but I think it’s great that u have our own style I just didn’t know if you did and if wanted to try it this way then u can... and I know I sent this to u in a private message but I didn’t know if u would get it so I posted it here again...I sorry again from percursors. |
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Re: The World
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Thursday, 27th February 2003 @ 02:37:50 PM AEST
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Tier this was great and so true. I agree with Percusor u should have put in more of a poem format. Keep on writing.
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: The World
(User Rating: 1 )
by wyrd_faerie on
Wednesday, 5th March 2003 @ 11:42:58 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| wonderful... |
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