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Our Secret Thing
Contributed by
Devils-confused-daugther
on
Wednesday, 24th January 2007 @ 05:19:47 AM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
Our Secret Thing
I stare at you from across
the courtyard,
our eyes meet,
only to run in opposite
directions
I know you feel it too,
we can't keep hurting,
denying,
lying,
buying the lies
this thing has lasted
a while,
nearing a year
since I said those
lies to your face
if I could, I'd take them back,
every one except the...
I love you
ones, they'll stay forever
true
forever binding me to you
forever reminding me of you
forever tormenting me of
'what could of been'
[Any good guys? plz tell me either way, thanz]
Copyright ©
Devils-confused-daugther
... [
2007-01-24 05:19:47]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Our Secret Thing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Flare_For_Despair on
Wednesday, 24th January 2007 @ 09:35:04 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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| its understandable and very relatable i think to alot of people. its really good |
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Re: Our Secret Thing
(User Rating: 1 )
by doug on
Wednesday, 24th January 2007 @ 08:12:05 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I liked the feel and the flow of
this poem. I think that is due to
your use of rhyming words placed
back to back in some parts. I think the
title fits well enough as well. Over all
I liked it but the reference to -lies- left
me wondering what happened exactly.
Other than that I thinkit was very good.
Truly , Doug
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Re: Our Secret Thing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Drapes on
Saturday, 27th January 2007 @ 02:16:53 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| I do like this, I like the ending and your style, keep writing! -Drapes |
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