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State of Mind
Contributed by
Rakerman1999
on
Friday, 12th January 2007 @ 11:47:31 PM in AEST
Topic:
selfstruggles
|
In this crazy state of mind
I allow myself to dream
of the willows in the wind
by a gently flowing stream
and I listen as they whisper
You are home, at home at last
lie in peace beside the water
let your tears be in the past
I see lilies in the field
just across the river there
and the fragrance of late spring
tells a tale upon the air
and I listen as it whispers
You are home, at home at last
lie in peace beside the water
let your tears be in the past
What is life but constant struggle with each single gasping breath
Just a comedy of errors and the final joke is death
From the depths of desperation fate has shown it's ugly face
and each fleeting hope for happiness is gone without a trace...
In this crazy state of mind
when my back is to the wall
I allow myself to dream...
but the dreamers always fall
and the willows and the waters
and the lilies take a bow
home and peace are dim and distant
and my tears are in the now
L. Carling C2007
Copyright ©
Rakerman1999
... [
2007-01-12 23:47:31]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Saturday, 13th January 2007 @ 12:12:47 AM AEST
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Leave the tears behind and enjoy the scents of the roses tossed around your feet.
There is just something about this write that consumes me.
Michelle |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Saturday, 13th January 2007 @ 06:52:20 AM AEST
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Good thing it's just atate of mind.
Great writing but please cheer up.
big huggs,
emy |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by NoSaint on
Saturday, 13th January 2007 @ 11:26:24 AM AEST
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Well written good flow
But we make our own happiness you know
Look deeper my friend you will find
A more gentle and sweet sate of mind
Orchids of the rarest kind
My friend ::Hugs::
Shari |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by ever1der on
Saturday, 13th January 2007 @ 12:36:52 PM AEST
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| sigh! this is wonderful. It's kind of sad..but the mechanics are down pat as usual. Smile, things can only go up from here..NOT LOL. |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Saturday, 13th January 2007 @ 01:33:09 PM AEST
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Oh Larry, this was such a beautiful write. Because I am a bit of a dreamer myself...the line "but the dreamers always fall" was so sad. Yes, my friend we fall, but we rise up bruised and sore and much wiser than before. Perfect write.
Peace and hugs,
Laura |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Saturday, 13th January 2007 @ 06:16:06 PM AEST
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Well, Larry, it's like having the waters of the psyche stirred with a feather - such a lighteness to the instrument but so dramatic an effect. Beautifully written - a lesson in how to write technically compelling poetry with such a human theme. It makes my heart ache for your pain and drew up mine as well, but it was worth it.
S |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 14th January 2007 @ 09:47:10 PM AEST
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larry .. my dear poet, this was so heart stirring .. and relatable.
Such a longing that is painful, at best. There is a lingering
sadness inside each line that fills me with a despondency
I've not ever been able to eradicate fully from my being.
You have stirred a feeling that I thought had been forgotten.
(I guess it was dormant for so long, I thought it gone forever).
Wonderfully emotive, my dear friend. Your pain is so
exceptionally expressed here, I feel a loss of my own ..
You have met this with grace and bravery .. and with
an exemplary talent. Beautifully painful ~
~Breezy |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jeff_Scott_Morehead on
Monday, 15th January 2007 @ 11:06:15 AM AEST
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Larry, ths is very beautiful.
I love your writing, and your kind soul.
Take care my friend.
Jeff |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 17th January 2007 @ 01:13:07 PM AEST
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| as usual...this is absolutely wonderfully written.....you never seem to dissappoint the reader Larry...Shari :) |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Saturday, 20th January 2007 @ 12:28:41 AM AEST
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Without needing to do any sort of checking or confirming, I am utterly certain that I've rambled on a good few times in your comment space regarding dreamers. This time, dear Larry, I'll be brief (LOL - that's new, huh?).........
I'd rather dreamt and fall then to never have dreamt at all (and I say as much... with perfect awareness that in allowing oneself to dream, we are lifted to such heights as to make the fall absolutely devastating).
May you be lifted up again, my friend.
~Snemmy
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Sunday, 21st January 2007 @ 10:52:16 PM AEST
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Dearest Larry what a painful, sad, yet beautiful write. Chucks Snemmers took the words outta my mouth. I would rather have dreamt and fallen than to have never dreamt at all. You have a beautiful heart my friend and may it be filled with all the love, joy & happiness for you are a most deserving soul.
Take care my dear friend.
love, hugs n prayers from ur fan/friend,
sue m |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by zenith66 on
Monday, 22nd January 2007 @ 06:40:41 PM AEST
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What a talent you posses my friend.
I lost myself in your words....again.
UNBELIEVABLE!!!! |
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Re: State of Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by sweetangeluk on
Saturday, 31st March 2007 @ 01:51:42 PM AEST
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I hear you my friend. From across the ocean your words are like a arrow inside my heart. This darkness is consuming me and my state of mind... want to scream from the roof tops and jump of a cliff. Painful sad write that i can relate to so very much.Roses for you to make your heart smile
Beautiful yet touched with sadness
Hugs |
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