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Gone
Contributed by
colada
on
Wednesday, 15th November 2006 @ 08:27:16 AM in AEST
Topic:
surreal
|
The disseminating abyss
Dispersing into my essence
I discern the void
Without a presence
My mercuriality is now
Vacillating into serendipity
As I confront feebly
The disintegrating city
Copyright ©
colada
... [
2006-11-15 08:27:16]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Gone
(User Rating: 1 )
by Light_to_your_Darkness on
Wednesday, 15th November 2006 @ 10:50:22 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| it sounds very beautiful...although for the sake of being honest I must say I didn't understand it. However, after looking up the words like the dork I am, I think you write very well and enjoyed it much :) |
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Re: Gone
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Thursday, 16th November 2006 @ 01:33:41 AM AEST
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a Message)
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It reads well, but need it really be so full of Latinate words? There's much to be said for brevity and good ol' strong Anglo-Saxon, as well.
Keep at it.
Andrew |
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