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No more
Contributed by
jackwilde
on
Saturday, 7th October 2006 @ 12:34:40 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
She can't take no more!
She needs a better life to live,
People around her don't understand her feelings,
Every time the sun's out it's raining,
over her,
She needs a better life to live.
Copyright ©
jackwilde
... [
2006-10-07 12:34:40]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: No more
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Saturday, 7th October 2006 @ 06:08:07 PM AEST
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a Message)
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A terrific little poem jw, really captures the sadness and frustration of someone feeling trapped and stultified by the relationship they are in. The repeating refrain works well, and the whole piece hits hits hard but smooth.
S |
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Re: No more
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 8th October 2006 @ 12:47:34 PM AEST
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That's my boy!
well done Jack writing work of this quality at the age of 12 you have a golden future ahead of you.
Dad. |
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Re: No more
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Saturday, 25th November 2006 @ 04:16:48 AM AEST
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I agree with your old man. You'll do better with your writing career, if you ever go in the direction.
Good poem. I love it.
Jane xoxo |
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